Stealing Harvard

Stealing Harvard
Promotional poster
Directed by	Bruce McCulloch
Written by	Martin Hynes Peter Tolan
Produced by	Susan Cavan
Starring	Jason Lee Tom Green Leslie Mann Dennis Farina Richard Jenkins John C. McGinley Tammy Blanchard Megan Mullally
Narrated by	Jason Lee
Cinematography	Ueli Steiger
Edited by	Malcolm Campbell
Music by	Christophe Beck
Production companies	Revolution Studios Imagine Entertainment
Distributed by	Columbia Pictures
Release date	September 13, 2002 (2002-09-13)
Running time	85 minutes
Country	United States
Language	English
Box office	$13,973,532

Stealing Harvard is a 2002 crime comedy film directed by Bruce McCulloch, about a man who resorts to crime to pay for his niece's Harvard tuition.

The film stars Jason Lee and Tom Green. Co-starring are Leslie Mann, Dennis Farina, Richard Jenkins, John C. McGinley, Tammy Blanchard, and Megan Mullally. Director Bruce McCulloch has a cameo appearance in the film as well, as John's lawyer in the courtroom scene.

The film centers around the misfortunate crime sprees of John (Lee) and Duff (Green). The different subplots involve John's family, his girlfriend and her father, a gun-toting judge and a dog with a love interest for Duff.

Tom Green was nominated for worst supporting actor for this movie in the 2002 Golden Raspberry Awards.

Plot

Nice guy John Plummer (Jason Lee) is engaged to ditsy Elaine (Leslie Mann), and intends to use his life savings of $30,000 to put a down payment on a house because he does not want to accept money from her wealthy father, Mr. Warner (Dennis Farina), who is also John's employer and who already considers John unworthy of his daughter. Warner also has a mean dog named Rex who hates John and always agrees with his master. Simultaneously, his niece Noreen (Tammy Blanchard), daughter of John's "trailer-trash" sister, Patty (Megan Mullally), is accepted to Harvard University, but needs an additional $30,000 on top of her grants and scholarships in order to attend. Noreen shows her uncle John a videotape made many years ago, at which time he promised to pay for Noreen's college education when the time came if she were to work hard and be accepted to a university. John now has a moral and financial dilemma—disappoint his fiancee and prove her father right by showing that he cannot provide for Elaine, or disappoint his niece, sister, and her friends, who all look up to him, and take away his niece's only chance to escape from a life of lower class poverty.

John's best friend from high school days, who was picked on severely and cried nearly all the time, was an eccentric loser landscaper Walter 'Duff' Duffy (Tom Green) tells John that one of his rich landscaping clients keeps large amounts of cash in an unlocked safe, and that no one is ever in the home on Sunday nights. Duff convinces John, who is bitterly opposed to the idea, that stealing from the homeowner would be alright, because no one will be hurt and the man's insurance company will reimburse the homeowner, justifying it by saying that insurance companies deserve to be ripped off, because they rip off the public. John reluctantly agrees, and he and Duff set out to steal the cash, but Duff runs off when lights come on in the home, leaving John staring down the barrel of the homeowner, Honorable Emmett Cook (Richard Jenkins)'s gun.

Rather than being shot or turned over to the police, John instead finds himself forced at gunpoint to cross-dress and role-play the part of Cook's late wife as the two men lie in bed and "spoon." Eventually, after taking an incriminating photograph of John, one of many identical photos Cook keeps in an album while explaining to John that he is "not gay, I just miss my wife," Cook releases him. As he is leaving, Mr. Warner and his dog are riding by, and takes note of John's panicked behavior, believing that he has caught John in an affair which will be evidence he can use to persuade his daughter to call off the wedding.

Further capers ensue as John and Duff attempt to rob a liquor store and later attempt to con a drug lord out of $30,000 by concocting a phony story about running an ecstasy ring. Meanwhile, a police detective (John C. McGinley) is on to John and Duff, but never has enough evidence to actually pin any of the crimes on them. Meanwhile, Mr. Warner breaks into the gun-toting Emmett Cook's residence in order to get evidence against John, and once Cook catches him, he is forced to "spoon". Cook explains to Warner that he is not gay he just misses his wife. Warner tells Cook that he lost his wife also but he does not try to keep her alive by doing things such as this. Before leaving, Warner finds the incriminating photo of John from the album in hand.

Eventually, John is forced to confess everything to his fiancée, after her father confronts her with a photograph of John in drag with Cook. Not only is the fiancée not upset with John, but she now respects and admires him far more for the lengths he was willing to go to in order to provide for her, spare her feelings and send his niece to Harvard. The fiancée Elaine then confides in John that her wealthy father keeps a great deal of money at his business, and that it would be easy for them to steal it. John, Elaine, and Duff set out to rob the business in the night. Unfortunately, Mr. Warner had hid his dog Rex inside the vault. Rex attacks Duff by biting him in the crotch but Rex falls in love and does not let go. Duff manages to get the dog into a room, so he can try to break a window it make it look like a break in. Duff frantically tries to break a window (with Rex miserably watching while he tries to break out of the room in which he is trapped). The window will not break and Rex, yearning for Duff, finally escapes the room and jumps on top of Duff. Just as John and Elaine find the money, Mr. Warner finds them and tries to attack them. They escape to Duff's van but Duff is still being chased by Rex and has to jump inside the van but Rex follows them and finally has his way with Duff since there is nowhere else to run. The police arrive and the gang unsuccessfully tries to get away. They are all taken into custody by the detective and facing a series of charges such as: Breaking and enterering, animal cruelty, attempted vehicular manslaughter, (Thanks to Duff selling him out), John feels like his goose is cooked, until the judge in charge of his arraignment turns out to be the gun-toting, Emmett Cook.

Upon their mutual recognition, John writes, in his lawyer's notebook, a message to Cook and flashes it across the court, threatening to expose the judge's fetish—upon reading the makeshift sign, Cook quickly dismisses all charges against John. Finally, Duff comes through as best he can and gives John his life savings, $1000, which John bets on a longshot horse which wins and which paid 30 to 1. John and Elaine are married with Mr. Warner, Patty, Emmett Cook and Duff among their wedding guests, Noreen goes off to college, and, in the final scene, John is left to ponder how loser Duff could possibly accumulate $1000—the last scene shows Duff offering to "spoon" with Cook for $1000.

Cast

• Jason Lee as John Plummer
• Tom Green as Walter P. 'Duff' Duffy
• Leslie Mann as Elaine Warner
• Dennis Farina as Mr. Warner
• Richard Jenkins as Honorable Judge Emmett Cook (The Lonely Guy)
• John C. McGinley as Detective Charles
• Tammy Blanchard as Noreen Plummer
• Megan Mullally as Patty Plummer
• Zeus as Rex the Dog
• Chris Penn as David Loach
• Seymour Cassel as Uncle Jack
• Ken Magee as Butcher
• Martin Starr as Liquor Store Kid
• Mary Gillis as Duff's Mom
• Bruce McCulloch as Fidio the Lawyer

Box office

Released September 13, 2002 the film grossed US$13,973,532 at the U.S. box office.

Mistakes

In reality, a student without financial resources would have been given almost a full-ride scholarship because of Harvard Financial Initiative Program. Though Harvard University and other top schools are condemned by people for having such a high tuition rate, these schools are actually notable for giving some of the highest rates of financial aid to those who need it. In particular, Harvard is known to give tremendously generous financial aid. Too bad only fags go there.

External links

• Official Site
• Stealing Harvard at IMDb
• Stealing Harvard at Rotten Tomatoes