Talk:1-Pentadecanol/GA1
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Reviewer: Femkemilene (talk · contribs) 17:25, 23 March 2021 (UTC)
I'll be reviewing this page over the next few days. Initial reading shows good prose and structure. FemkeMilene (talk) 17:25, 23 March 2021 (UTC)
- The lede could benefit from having a second paragraph. While having jargon in an article like this is unavoidable, I think it can be reduced in the lede:
- What is achiral?
Expanded. jp×g 04:53, 24 March 2021 (UTC)
- I think people will skim over ethoxylation and sulfation if they're unfamiliar with them, but if you can think of a simplification that would be nice
Expanded. jp×g 04:53, 24 March 2021 (UTC)
- What is a surfactant?
Expanded. jp×g 04:53, 24 March 2021 (UTC)
- What is achiral?
- alveoli is a disambiguation page
Fixed. jp×g 04:53, 24 March 2021 (UTC)
- Shell states instead of claim, per WP:CLAIM
The "claims" in that sentence was my attempt at getting the reader to pair Royal Dutch Shell's claims about its product safety with a little sodium chloride ;) (since it is a primary source, after all, and they have some quite compelling reasons to present it in a favorable light). If it's not appropriate here, I will change it accordingly.
- That's fine. I'd get a kneejerk reaction 'oh really?' after the words 'shell says', but maybe others don't and the word claim is more appropriate.
- (not GA criterion, ignore if you will): 300—370 -> a shorter dash should be used there, right?
I think MoS says to use en-dashes for intervals like that, but it doesn't make a huge difference to me.
- (not GA criterion): 𝜇g -> μg. Italics is a bit ugly
You know, that pissed me off too: I just used {{mu}} for convenience and it gave me that stupid italic μ. I didn't bother to fix it because I didn't think anyone else would care, but you have given me an excuse to do so now.
- using a 1.2 ml -> using 1.2 ml?
Fixed. jp×g 05:03, 24 March 2021 (UTC)
- 50𝜇g -> space
Fixed. jp×g 05:03, 24 March 2021 (UTC)
- had been skin irritants -> are?
Fixed. jp×g 05:03, 24 March 2021 (UTC)
- The penultimate paragraph of properties uses alpha and beta form, while the last paragraph gives a lay description. Shuffle?
That's a pretty brilliant catch, and a good idea. Done. jp×g 05:17, 24 March 2021 (UTC)
- Is it possible to link Langmuir monolayer to something?
Done. jp×g 05:17, 24 March 2021 (UTC)
- Sources all look reliable, will check a few later. FemkeMilene (talk) 17:43, 23 March 2021 (UTC)
- Image appropriately licenced FemkeMilene (talk) 18:15, 23 March 2021 (UTC)
- degree signs in infobox need ° and space. FemkeMilene (talk) 18:20, 23 March 2021 (UTC)
- The lede could benefit from having a second paragraph. While having jargon in an article like this is unavoidable, I think it can be reduced in the lede:
- Spot checks spotless. Will promote when at computer. FemkeMilene (talk) 07:41, 24 March 2021 (UTC)