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Talk:Battle of Suoi Bong Trang/GA1

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GA Review

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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: AustralianRupert (talk) 23:38, 8 December 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Progression

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  • Version of the article when originally reviewed: [1]
  • Version of the article when review was closed: [2]

Initial comments/suggestions

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  • in the References, the locations probably need states added to them;
  • in the Prelude, "...search and destroy operations through out the..." should be "throughout", not "through out";
  • the first sentence in the Prelude is quite long and probably could be broken up, "Headquarters US 1st Infantry Brigade was located about 1,000 metres (1,100 yd) east of the engineer base camp in the vicinity of the hamlet of Tan Binh, just north of the new roadway and less than 5 kilometres (3.1 mi) west of Route 16 and with the battalions of the brigade widely dispersed carrying out search and destroy operations through out the area of operations, it was only lightly defended";
  • "...minimum of two Local Force platoons, and possibly a Local Force company was..." I think it should be "were" not "was" because there are multiple platoons ...
  • "... while at night securing the laterite pit..." might sound better as "...while securing the laterite pit at night...";
  • "...dead soldiers were well equipped" according to the Macquarie Austalian dictionary it should be "well-equipped";
  • "...D800 Independent battalion..." I think this should be "...D800 Independent Battalion" as it seems like a proper noun;
  • in the Battle section, "...augmenting that of Company B, 1st Battalion, 28th Infantry Regiment..." (I'm not sure what "that of" means here, it might need to be reworded);
  • I suggest wikilinking "battery" in the first paragraph of the Battle section;
  • "...held back against the weight of American firepower" perhaps "held back by the weight...?"
  • in the Battle section, "the base plate" might need clarification. The casual reader might not understand what this means. Can it be wikilinked, perhaps?;
  • "...Elsewhere, at 02:45, three Viet Cong soldiers had moved to with in 25 metres ..." I think it should be "within" here;
  • "...Finally, the main Viet Cong attack began at 05:30, yet earlier losses had been heavy and they were unable..." I suggest adding a semi colon after "05:30" and replacing "yet" with "earlier losses had been heavy, however, and as a result they were...";
  • In the Aftermath, this might sound better "The Australians continued to provide protection to the US engineers for the next two days, before being replaced by an American infantry battalion." if it were changed to "For the next two days, the Australians continued to provide protection to the US engineers before being replaced by an American infantry battalion."
Cheers mate. I have fixed these now. Anotherclown (talk) 22:54, 9 December 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Technical review

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Criteria

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  • It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS):
  • All issues identified have been addressed.
  • It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
  • No issues.
  • It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  • No issues.
  • No issues.
  • It is stable.
    No edit wars etc.:
  • No issues.
  • It contains images, where possible, to illustrate the topic.
    a (tagged and captioned): b (Is illustrated with appropriate images): c (non-free images have fair use rationales): d public domain pictures appropriately demonstrate why they are public domain':
  • No issues.
  • Overall:
    a Pass/Fail: