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Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment

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This article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between 27 August 2018 and 5 December 2018. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Vrodr3, Hchaud9uic, ECM32. Peer reviewers: Bergkj, Kylierupp8, Trevorwidger5.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 19:53, 17 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

PeerReview/bergkj

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I like the way that you organized the Housing Programs and Services section with sub-headers. The Acclaims section is a great idea, I plan on adding a similar section to my article. Thanks for the idea! Your lead, the beginning sentence could be condensed or broken into multiple sentences. Omit "it is following" in the second sentence and just say "Deborah's Place's mission is to provide...". I edited the word "helped" in the last sentence in the lead as it is a weighted, non neutral word. I added some links to Wikipedia pages within the article, now appearing as blue links within the page.

Suggestions: -Include a "Notable People" section that includes more information about important people as they relate to Deborah's Place. Some notable people may be CEO Audrey Thomas, Kathy Booton Wilson, or alum of the program. For example, for Kathy's profile you could include that she is a professor (https://wgntv.com/2012/11/30/chicagos-very-own-kathy-booton-wilson/). -Review individual words with a neutral lens in mind, especially as it pertains to what services Deborah's Place offers. It is also important to assume neutrality when talking about the Church, parse history section with a neutral lens in mind. -There seems to be a problem with the reference link source number 8 that I couldn't figure out. It might be beneficial to ask Professor McDowell about it.

Overall, great job. Very interesting cause. Bergkj (talk) 23:47, 4 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Peer review/kylierupp8

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I like the page as a whole, there is a lot of information! I like that you guys have a lot of subheadings under each header, it shows that you guys found a lot of credible information on the nonprofit. Will have to use more of the subheadings for our article Chicago Cares. Changes:

  • Under the heading housing programs and services I think it would look better if you had them in Alphabetical order, or if they were in chronological order of when each opened. That might be hard to find dates, but I think having the date of when each opened would make the article look good and give the reader ever more insight.
  • Take out the words "Protestants and Catholics shared" I feel like using the actual people names might fit better for this sentence or just removing it, because it almost sounds a little preachy.
  • Adding a notable people section as Kjerstin suggested would look great! We have one on our page. You could put Audrey Thomas and Kathy Booton in it and find links that talk a little more about them or give some history on them.

I re wrote the sentence under "Safe Haven" changing the P to a p and adding the amount of women that are helped. I think adding the number adds a little more knowledge to the viewer. I think adding "The close community of 325 women age 18 and up that Deborah's Place serves annually includes lesbian, transgender and gender non-conforming individuals" in the article would make it great! I found this in your 2nd reference by the windy city times! I added a sentence to "High school athletes pen messages of hope to women in need" about the socks that were donated. As I looked at that source more it also had "$1,000 check collected by hundreds of athletes from 80 public and private city and suburban high schools" that you guys could maybe think of adding! It gives more info than just saying the schools donated letters. This is from reference 12 I like the idea of having "other" for just anything that maybe interesting to the cause so it can be included. This could come in handy for Chicago Cares page. Over all great job!! I really like the non-profit you guys chose, it deserves a wiki page!

-kylierupp8 — Preceding unsigned comment added by Kylierupp8 (talkcontribs) 04:17, 7 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Peer Review/trevorwidger5

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Overall, this article has an ample amount of information about the organization's goals and its history. That is certainly the main strength of it as it stands, well done on that front. I think the main development going forward will be a structural one, as well as providing additional information for certain sections. Specifically, your intro and history have sufficient information. History especially appears to be a sizeable body of text. However, the subsequent sections are marred by superfluous subheadings and minimal body text. I believe creating an organized list format would better suit the content rather than dedicating a subheading to single sentences. Furthermore, sometimes the wording does come across as too positive or conclusive. For instance, if the organization is combating homelessness, make sure you say "the goal of the organization is to..." rather than "the organization has combated poverty." It may seem really minor, but the difference between them is saying "this is what they have provided as their mission" rather than "this is what they already accomplished! yaay!" Anyway, like I said a lot of the info is really good. I did completely edit the sentence where you discuss the usage of a 'feminist perspective' and also added a note that such a claim definitely needs its own citation and perhaps more explanation.

Cheers!

--Trevorwidger5 (talk) 06:30, 7 November 2018 (UTC)[reply]