Talk:Good Girl Gone Bad Live/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Hahc21 (talk · contribs) 15:54, 14 September 2012 (UTC)[reply]

"She also explains how flying with private jet together with her team which is like "one family" is fun, but also very rare." >> "She also explains how flying in private jet with her team like "one family" is fun, but very rare"

"Scenes of Rihanna performing a show in Ischgl are shown. After the performance Rihanna and part of her team are out on the streets having snowball fight." Could this me merged into a single sentence?

"were touring for a lot of time" >> a lot of time? I think is more proffesional to say "a considerable amout of time" or similar

"giving four stars and wrote that" different tenses. Say "gave it four stars and wrote" or "giving four stars and writing"
"isn't going to win" The way you start the quotation makes a break on the sentence. Better to say that he wrote that "it isn't going to win"
"their recorded version" it may be "verisons"
Well. I've read the section and the prose is quite weird. I consider rewriting the entire section with a more cohesive and fluent prose.

"before falling to number 19 for the week dated August 16, 2012." 2012?
"in the United States alone" if you say RIAA, you don't have to write this, as it is redundant.
"In Australia, Good Girl Gone Bad Live entered the Australian Music DVD Chart at its peak of number six for the issue dated June 30, 2012" 2012?
"The next week... The next week" Overuse of the next week here.
"however, it rose to number one the next week" next week is way too used. Try to use the following week or another word.