Talk:Lew Krausse Sr./GA1
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Reviewer: GhostRiver (talk · contribs) 17:10, 29 January 2022 (UTC)
Well, after reviewing Jr., it only makes sense that I should take on this one as well! — GhostRiver 17:10, 29 January 2022 (UTC)
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Infobox and lede
[edit]- "whom he helped win" → "with whom he won"
- Very pedantic: should be a period after "Jr" in "Lew Jr."
Early life
[edit]- Switch order of sentences so that the fastball is sandwiched between his high school career & Athletics signing
Philadelphia Athletics
[edit]- Today in voices I hear: an undergraduate professor telling me never to start a sentence with "However". Here, especially, because some people read one section at a time and the part about his signing is in a different section, the construction of the first sentence jolts the reader
- "in place of them" → "in their place"
- Link unearned run and complete game
- A little more awkward setup here: I think it can be made clearer that Mack was resting his pitchers so that they could be sharp for the Series and that this was still the regular season.
- Link "doubleheaders" to Doubleheader (baseball) and home run
- The idea that Sunday baseball was once prohibited in PA is wild to me; my godmother's family have Sunday season ticket packages
Sore arm
[edit]- Make sure NYPL is linked to New York–Pennsylvania League (1923–1937) and not to the 1939–2020 club
Elmira
[edit]- I understand it's because of the name change, but it's awkward that this is the one section that doesn't have the team name
- Since it was Pioneers 3 out of 4 seasons, I think it's fine to call it Elmira Pioneers. Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk) 21:22, 29 January 2022 (UTC)
- "won a career-high 24 games, setting the Elmira team record" → "set a franchise record with a career-high 24 games won"
- "6.5 games" → "6+1⁄2 games"
- Link Hazleton Mountaineers (baseball) and Wilkes-Barre (minor league baseball club)
- "third baseman/outfielder" → "third baseman and outfielder"
Cardinals and Red Sox organizations
[edit]- No apostrophes needed in the header
Military and final season
[edit]- "he was relying on curveballs to get hitters out" → "he was best known for his "assortment of curveballs"" (or something of that sort, I just really like the newspaper quote)
Post-playing career
[edit]- Commas around "the Phillies" instead of dashes
- Link and capitalize Midwestern United States
Personal life
[edit]- Link heart attack
- Normally I'd ask for a cause of death but none of his obits seemed to mention it
- I know, right? Doesn't help that 90% of the "Lew Krausse" obituaries are for his son... Sanfranciscogiants17 (talk) 21:26, 29 January 2022 (UTC)
References
[edit]- Good
General comments
[edit]- Images are public domain and relevant
- No stability concerns in the revision history
- Earwig score looks great, even the mirror sites have a low % match
Putting on hold now! — GhostRiver 17:36, 29 January 2022 (UTC)
- Excellent work, passing now! — GhostRiver 21:46, 31 January 2022 (UTC)