Talk:Long-toed salamander/GA2
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Hi, I am reviewing this article for GA. In general, it seems like a very well written, well referenced article. I have done some copy editing and you are free to revert. I have only a few comments. —Mattisse (Talk) 01:35, 3 July 2009 (UTC)
- Nitpick comments
- "Therefore, A. macrodactylum speciated from A. laterale after the Paleocene ..." - is "speciated" a verb? Speciation is a noun but I have not seen the verb.
- Yes, it's a verb too. The linked article does a pretty good job of explaining it. Sasata (talk) 05:14, 3 July 2009 (UTC)
- "and after the loss of the Western Interior Seaway, which opened the access route into the Western Cordillera." - this is unclear. Did the loss of the Western Interior Seaway open the route, i.e. provided a land bridge or route?
- Rephrased: "It has been suggested that A. macrodactylum speciated from A. laterale after the Paleocene, when the loss of the Western Interior Seaway opened an access route into the Western Cordillera." Sasata (talk) 05:14, 3 July 2009 (UTC)
- "Prior to hatching, while in the egg and as a newborn larvae,..." - is this a case of misplaced commas eg. Prior to hatching while in the egg, and as a newborn larvae,? Or are newborn larvae considered to be "in the egg"?
- Now "Prior to hatching—both in the egg and as newborn larvae—they have balancers," Sasata (talk) 05:14, 3 July 2009 (UTC)
- "some individuals grow bigger heads and become cannibals to feed upon their own brood mates." - become cannibals to feed? or, become cannibals and feed? to feed sounds deterministic.
- "...some individuals grow bigger heads and become cannibals, feeding upon their own brood mates."
- "Population level diversity is what provides ecosystem services,[65] such as the keystone role that salamanders play in the soil ecosystems, such as nutrient cycling supporting wetland and forested ecosystems." - two "such as" in the same sentence.
- Fixed. Sasata (talk) 05:14, 3 July 2009 (UTC)
- "Forestry, roads, and other land developments that alter the environments that amphibians migrate to have increased mortality." - run-on sentence with two "that"s.
- --> "Forestry, roads, and other land developments have altered the environments that amphibians migrate to, and have increased mortality."
- "For example, the average total area harvested on an annual basis in British Columbia is 7,700 hectares (19,000 acres) per year." - I don't know what to think of this statistic without a comparison.
- After some digging around, I removed the statement: BC's forested area amounts to roughly 63 million hectares, so a loss of 7,700 hectares is only about 0.01%, which seems pretty small, and doesn't really support the statement made in the previous sentence. Sasata (talk) 05:14, 3 July 2009 (UTC)
Extremely interesting article.
- I thought so too :) I can't take any credit for writing it though, I just didn't want the last GA review to go to waste! Thanks for reviewing. Sasata (talk) 05:14, 3 July 2009 (UTC)
—Mattisse (Talk) 01:35, 3 July 2009 (UTC)
Final GA review (see here for criteria)
- It is reasonably well written.
- a (prose): Clearly written
b (MoS): Follows MoS
- a (prose): Clearly written
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (references): Well referenced
b (citations to reliable sources): Sources are reliable
c (OR): No OR
- a (references): Well referenced
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects): Covers major aspects in context
b (focused): Remains focused
- a (major aspects): Covers major aspects in context
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias: Neutral
- Fair representation without bias: Neutral
- It is stable.
- No edit wars etc.: Stable
- No edit wars etc.: Stable
- It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):
b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):
- Overall: A particularly interesting and comprehensive article
- Pass/Fail: Pass
- Pass/Fail: Pass
Congratulations!