Talk:Mike Jackson (right-handed pitcher)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 20:18, 6 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I'll review this article shortly. Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 20:18, 6 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Here are the issues I found:

Baseball Almanac's not considered a reliable source. luckily that ref can just be replaced by something from B-R.

Replaced.

Can we have a page number on the Yankee encyclopedia reference?

Page added.

"was a professional baseball player " is a former; was is used when someone's dead, which he's not.

Fixed.

Anything else on his early life? For example, i presume he played baseball in both, did he play other sports, and is there any further information on his college career? I know this and other expansion requests will be difficult due to his very common name (that's why i stick with the less common ones myself), but it's worth at least trying.

Went three pages deep on a "Mike Jackson Hill College -Michael Jackson", one page on "Mike Jackson Forest Brook -Michael Jackson", and three on "Mike Jackson MLB pitcher -Michael Jackson" Google News searches. I tried a search on Hill College's website, which yielded this page, which is incorrect and only states Jackson was drafted by Cleveland. I tried a Google search "mike jackson baseball early life -Michael Jackson" but couldn't find anything. Maybe when he dies more information will surface.

"Jackson was again drafted by the Phillies," which round, since you have the previous year's round listed?

Added

Noting what level the Suns play at may be useful since it's a redlink. Creating the article would be nice as well but that's obviously not a requirement.

Single-A, added.

"In 1988 and '89," write out 1989

Done.

"The 1994 MLB season was shortened to 115 games for the Giants, where Jackson contributed to the their 55–60 record while recording a team-best 1.49 ERA[17] although his season was cut short due to tendinitis in his right elbow, leading to two stints on the disabled list." this could do with rewording and a sentence split. How many games did jackson play? were the two stints on the fl rather close to each other or several months apart? Not sure if the Giants' record helps the article much here as well.

Removed Giants' record, added injury dates, added games played.

Were there any discussions from other teams on acquiring him for 2005, or did he end up just retiring after his White Sox tenure?

Can't find any sources. this MLB.com ref says he had minor-league offers for the 2003 season, so he probably had minor-league offers, but there's no source.

You've probably done this, but to double-check, the prose feels a bit light, just glossing over statistical information in spots. Is there any more out there for some seasons that are only one or two sentences? adding in "mike jackson" "seattle mariners" (or whichever team) to google archive search for various years may help find some info, since a few teams, namely the mariners and giants (the other teams are fine as is), feel only glanced over.

Added some stats to both.

Any personal life info aside from the bit already in the article? Again, may be tough to find, but I always ask this just to be sure.

Added a sentence.

I'll put the article on hold, and once the concerns are addressed I'll give it a re-read. It's not too bad right now, and with some work it can be a GA soon enough. Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 02:56, 7 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]

All comments addressed. Albacore (talk) 02:46, 9 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Looks good; I'll go another read-through tomorrow to see if there's anything else. Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 03:07, 9 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]

My apologies for the delay in getting to this; went through a sweep of every baseball bio to make sure it was project tagged, which took up both my time and sanity. Anyway, here's the rest of the review:

For the lead, I'd end the first para at the games pitched spot and make the second paragraph a chronological summary, modifying what's already in the lead.
For the Phillies section, and most of them for that matter, you can toss a few he's in to replace a couple Jackson's to avoid repetition.
"In his last Major League year," reword to "In his last professional season," sounds crisper that way.

Once these fixes are made I'll pass the article. Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 02:51, 14 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]

All fixed with these edits. Albacore (talk) 03:03, 14 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Looks good. Everything else checks out so I'll pass this as a GA. Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 16:05, 14 August 2011 (UTC)[reply]