Jump to content

Talk:Samuel Lightfoot Flournoy (lawyer)/GA1

Page contents not supported in other languages.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

GA Review

[edit]
GA toolbox
Reviewing

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: BenLinus1214 (talk · contribs) 01:31, 14 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Hey West Virginian! I'll take this one after reviewing Adventure Time (season 6). Johanna (aka BenLinus1214)talk to me!see my work 01:31, 14 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

@West Virginian: Comments

  • Let's talk a bit about the naming of this page, as his father was a lawyer from West Virginia as well.
  • BenLinus1214, as you can see, I was unable to think of another way to differentiate him from his father. For that reason, I am definitely open to suggested alternatives. Let me know if you have anything specific in mind. He and his father didn't do us any favors by not using the suffixes Senior and Junior, so those are off the table. -- West Virginian (talk) 03:01, 20 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • BenLinus1214, I will brainstorm some options for renaming this article and his father's article and I will keep you posted for your recommendation. Thanks again for performing this excellent GA review! As always, it's been a privilege working with you throughout this process. -- West Virginian (talk) 03:44, 20 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Lead
  • I think this lead is a bit too detailed for my taste--are there any lesser details about his life that can be excluded here?
  • Also, in this two-paragraph format, the two should probably be more equal in length to one another.
  • There's the verb "to serve" twice in two sentences :) Check for this throughout, although it's a lot less pronounced than it was in James Sloan Kuykendall.
Early life and education
  • Offline sources accepted AGF.
  • You don't have to link Charleston Daily Mail every time something from it is cited--that's a bit of WP:OVERLINK. Also, you don't need to include the location in any of the Charleston Daily Mail things--it will be obvious to most and is redundant as such.
Law and political careers
  • "engaged in the practice of law" is a bit clunky--maybe "practiced law"
  • Any links for arbitrator and commissioner?
  • You might be able to get away with it, but watch the over-usage of the verb "to appoint" here.
  • What is an "at-large" seat?
  • "Flournoy was ultimately unsuccessful in his bid for election to the at-large city council seat." Is this in one of your current sources? If so, cite it after this sentence.
  • BenLinus1214, I was able to find information about his bid for election, but he was not listed in any records of Charleston city councilpersons so I deduced that his run was unsuccessful. How should I word this, given that there is no specific reporting stating as such. -- West Virginian (talk) 03:14, 20 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
  • For the re-indexing part, what did they find or do as a result of the investigation? Or do the sources not say.
  • "third member" the third member ever? Or are there only three people on the committee? Or is this some sort of position? No matter what, make it a bit clearer.
Business pursuits
  • I don't think it really makes sense for "law and political careers" to be one section and "business pursuits" to be another--either put them all under one section (maybe "Career") and give them subheadings or split all three into separate sections. I would prefer the former, but it's up to you.
Later life and death
  • "He was survived by…" I don't think you should mention his children and wife by name in this section and the next section, because it sort of makes the reader go, "but you already told us about them." If you just say "his wife" or "his son" here, that'll be fine. Also, why isn't his daughter included in the list of people he was survived by?
  • BenLinus1214, thank you for the suggestion! I've incorporated "his wife" and "his son" into the text. His daughter was not mention in the article, and it is unclear as to what happened to her as I was unable to find any records of her death. Her vital records are on my permanent list of data to acquire, so once I have evidence either way, I will include it in this article. -- West Virginian (talk) 03:22, 20 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

@West Virginian: Good work. A few comments before I can pass. By the way, given that you have some experience with featured lists, I was wondering if you could comment at my FLC for List of accolades received by Boys Don't Cry (film)--I would really appreciate it. :) Johanna (aka BenLinus1214)talk to me!see my work 02:36, 20 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]

  • @BenLinus1214:, thank you so incredibly much for taking the time to engage in this rather thorough and comprehensive review. I really appreciate your eye for detail and I think the article is much better now because of it! I promise to take a look at your FLC in the next few days. Thanks again for the review! -- West Virginian (talk) 03:22, 20 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]
GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, no copyvios, spelling and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:
Retrieved from "https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Talk:Samuel_Lightfoot_Flournoy_(lawyer)/GA1&oldid=1137171978"