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Talk:To Be Loved (Adele song)/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Troubled.elias (talk · contribs) 15:06, 11 July 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Hello! I'll be taking this review, just to ease the GAN backlog a little. If you have the time, I'll appreciate if you left a review for Not My Responsibility - it's a pretty brief article and should take a short while to read :) ‍ ‍ elias. 🧣 ‍ ‍ 💬reach out to me
📝see my work 15:06, 11 July 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for picking this up. I will address the comments after the review is placed on hold, if that is okay, lest I keep getting too excited and abusing you with pings, lol.--NØ 19:38, 11 July 2022 (UTC)[reply]


GA review
(see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar):
    b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references):
    b (citations to reliable sources):
    c (OR):
    d (copyvio and plagiarism):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):
    b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):
    b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

Overall:
Pass/Fail:

· · ·


  • Opening comments
    • All of these sources are Certified Reliable(tm) for music-related articles; this is good! No reference errors jump out; the references section looks pretty compliant with MOS:NOTES.
    • The article covers all the aspects I would expect a song article to cover - background, release, composition, and reception.
    • Article history is stable.
    • Only one image used in the article, which is a public domain photo from the US federal government.
    • I find the Whitney Houston image fitting, but can we move it to the "Composition" section where the comparison is made?
      • The comparison is included in both sections. I am trying to break the five paragraph-long wall of text with its current placement. I will move it if you really insist, though.
        • Oh, I didn't see that at first. No worries, you don't have to do this


  • Spotchecks: I've used a pseudo-RNG to generate a sample of 11 references to check for any WP:V or WP:OR issues. I expect them to be clear, though, since you're a veteran editor with a lot of FAs/GAs under your belt :) Reference numbers refer to this version of the article.
    • [2] - verified
    • [8] - verified first instance and second instances. There is somewhat of a close paraphrasing wrt the source and the first information cited by this, and while it would be neat to fix that, it isn't *that* egregious
    • [9] - verified quote, plus the "they both cried" claim. This is too depressing :(
    • [12] - verified first and second instances
    • [19] - verified - "torch ballad" description
    • [23] - Ooh, this is a lot. Four instances. So first instance of this citation is there to cite a quote, which I can verify. Second instance is for the "cracks voice during bridge" thing which I can also verify. Third and fourth instances involve quotes from the source itself: no OR or V issues found
    • [31] - verified
    • [40] - verified. Good paraphrasing.
    • [44] - verified both the placement and the quote
    • [48] - verified that it is unranked and that "To Be Loved" is in there
    • [54] - verified.
  • From my spotchecks, no OR or V issues were found. AGF that the unchecked references are also valid. There were some closely paraphrased lines as I've indicated above but this doesn't need urgent fixing here IMO. Doesn't indicate any copyvio either; ran this through Earwig and it didn't pick up anything.


  • Prose - this is in no particular order
    • (MOS:LEAD) Lead is well-written and I can already tell it's representative of the entire article. Good job with this!
    • (MOS:WORDSTOWATCH) All quotes, opinions, observations, etc. etc. here are attributed properly. Would like these quotes to be cut down somewhat in favor of some paraphrasing, but out of respect I won't ask to do it here. Better that during an FAC or PR. Things such as "rave reception" or "best songs of 2021" or "powerful vocals" are cited to sources that clearly say it, so no issues of puffery arise.
      • I got a little lazy since GANs are usually less stringent in stuff like this :P. I hope I was able to make this better.
      • Just noticed this: "his passing from cancer". MOS:EUPHEMISM, which is part of WORDSTOWATCH, advises against using "passing [away]" and suggests to use the clearer alternative, which is dying.
        • Done.
    • (MOS:LAYOUT) Order of article elements is good; each section of the body is titled and arranged properly. Paragraphs are pretty cohesive and are split properly. I've said above that the Whitney Houston image can be moved up the Composition section - please do so. Might want to shrink it using |upright= as well just so it fits
    • MOS:FICTION and MOS:LISTS don't really apply here. The compliance with the above MOS guidelines is mostly good - just one issue to be resolved
    • "The song was among those she played" - which song? You listed three of them prior. Would clarify that you're obviously referring to "To Be Loved" here
    • "Jesso Jr. plays the piano, and produced the song" be consistent with tenses
    • "parlays" is too informal, me thinks, and somewhat confusing to someone unfamiliar with the term
    • "induce an impulse to applaud in the listener" - gave me pause for a second. Is it just me or should this be "an impulse to applaud from the listener"?
    • Wikilink "chest belt" to "Belting (music)", "vibrato" to "Vibrato", and "bridge" to "Bridge (music)" for unfamiliar readers
    • "dulcet" "apportion" "stentorian" "sullied" - lots of unfamiliar vocabulary words here... What do these intend to convey? Where possible, strive for simpler wording. Or, wikilink to Wiktionary, although I prefer the former solution
      • (No shade to you personally but) people should look those up in case they are unfamiliar. They're real words.
        • Huh. Pardon but I am confused by this. Sure, they can look it up. I certainly had to do that before typing this here. Though I will note that the NYT source cited for the "apportion" sentence says "...what it means to share her life" which is. Not exactly close to how 'apportion' is apparently defined... Remember that GAN crit 1a says we have to make this clear and understandable to a broad audience. This choice of words gets even more confusing when you look up what the words mean and compare it to what the sources say. Plus, why should we waste readers' time doing all the searching when we can just opt for clearer diction?
          I'll be more lenient here - I'm fine with "dulcet" and "sullied" staying, I suppose. Easy enough to understand from context clues. But "apportion" and "stentorian" can definitely be replaced.
          • I'll budge on "apportion". Stentorian, however, even according to the wikitionary, conveys the appropriate meaning here exactly, so I'll be retaining that with a link. I could just change these now and then switch back after the nomination is passed but I would prefer not to do that.
            • That's totally fair! Thanks for the cooperation. Consider this one striked
    • "being royal as always" - this is one of those instances where I would prefer the actual quote from the critic over the paraphrasing. I don't get what this is trying to say.
    • The "commercial performance" section reads clear to me. "Credits and personnel" and "charts" are fine.
    • The critics seem unanimous in the opinion that this is a damn good song... hm. Might wanna listen to it sometime. There's one criticism of the song here about replayability, so it doesn't lean too hard on the positivity I suppose. Compliant enough with WP:NPOV.
      • You haven't heard 30??? Would definitely recommend, especially if you enjoyed Sour :)
        • No. I have onlyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh heard the lead single. Clearly a poor decision on my part. Though I'm still reeling in from relistening to Happier Than Ever for a while, so my metaphorical cups are pretty full at the moment :")
    • The article doesn't go on unrelated tangents, and seems focused to me.


The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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