Talk:Typhoon Nina (1987)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Hurricanehink (talk · contribs) 03:59, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

There is no need for the disambiguation at the top. No one could get TS Nina confused with this storm. However, it would be a useful link in the see also section, more so than List of tropical cyclones.
- Moved. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

" was the most intense typhoon to strike the Philippines since Typhoon Irma in 1984." - that's only three years. Is there nothing more fancy? Like Xth deadliest Philippine storm?
- I think the Xth deadliest Philippine storm is too trivial. But Irma was six years, not three, so I fixed that. ~~ 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)
"and on November 19, was first classified as a tropical cyclone" - why does infobox say the 16th?
- Changed. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Why did you wait so long to link typhoon?
- Moved. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
"before attaining its peak intensity of 170 km/h (105 mph)" - I was gonna ask if this was in 1-min or 10-min, but I noticed, this doesn't match either value in the infobox. So.......
- Fixed, and sticking to JMA since it's official. 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)

Now it says "before attaining its peak 10 minuet intensity of 175 km/h (110 mph)^*", which is still inconsistent with the infobox. And JMA wasn't official then, it didn't become an RSMC until 1989. So if you want to say 10-minute winds there, you should say who said that? ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 14:37, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Listen, I like to avoid that JMA/JTWC crap in leads because IMO it is confusing. Look at all my other 80s WPAC articles. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 15:19, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Why did you link Truk Atoll twice? (its name is Chuuk Lagoon). And why is there a link to a river in England?
- Fixed both. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane

Is Weno the same place as Meon? Also, you have a link for [[Chuuk Lagoon|Chuuk Lagoon]] Am I crazy or is that the same thing? ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 14:37, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Apparently it's the capital of Chuuk Lagoon, and I take it Meon is/was per the old version of the article. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 15:19, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"After crossing the Philippines, Nina brought extensive damage to the northern portion of the island group." - so it caused damage *after* it crossed the islands? Not during?
- Better? Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
"The town of Matnog sustained the worst damage from the typhoon. There, 287 people died." - merge
- Done. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Boac is a dab
- Corrected. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Too much of the 2nd lede paragraph is "In [X location], [Y effects happened]." Try changing up the structure
- Better. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
"a little over 90,000 houses were destroyed" - is there a reason you used this wording instead of the equally factually "about 90,000..."
- To mix it up, but changed. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Why no Philippine death toll in the lead?
- Noted. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
"An area of convection developed in mid-November near the International Date Line" - this could refer to anywhere from Antarctica to the North Pole.
- Better? Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Kinda, but that could still be in the SHEM. Give people some general idea where the storm formed. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 14:37, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

I added NHEM, but feel it's too wordy now. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 15:19, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"a Tropical Cyclone Formation Alert (TCFA) was issued by the JTWC" - avoid passive voice
- Tweaked. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
"Continuing to rapidly become better organized while moving west-northwest, the JTWC " - the JTWC was becoming organized?
- Right :P Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

You have another one of those - "Following a significant increase in organization, the JTWC issued..." Don't use these dangling participles. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 14:37, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

I was afraid you were gonna bring this up. Should be fixed though. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 15:19, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

" 110 km (68 mi)" - round?
- Whoops. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
The MH is a bit long, but not because of excessive details. You mention a lot about intensification slowing, continuing, and small changes in movements. In the grand scheme of things, I think these can be cut down a bit
- Cut back a little. Better, worse, or the same? Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Little better, but could you merge two of the paragraphs? ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 14:37, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

" 215 km/h (135 mph), making it a low-end Category 5 system" - 135 mph is C4. But lead says 165 mph. Which one is right?
- Fixed. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
Where was the Luzon landfall?
- That's unfortunately quit vague in the ATCR. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Do you have the landfall point? If so, you can give the mileage to the nearest major city or province. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 14:37, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"After passing near Truk, which has a population of 42,000, Typhoon Nina brought heavy damage to the area." - after or while?
- Changed. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
"Hundreds of people were evacuated while the typhoon also inflicted severe crop damage" - neither relate to each other, so why are they mentioned in the same sentence? The whole section just seems like a jumble of text without much flow.
- Better? Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

No. Why did you get rid of the bit about crop damage? ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 14:37, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Brought back, but I don't like the wording at all. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 15:19, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"many fisherman ignored the aforementioned warnings and refuse to feel to higher ground" - what does this mean?
- Was I drunk? Anyhow, fixed. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Are you still drunk?! "many fisherman ignored the alters and refused to flee to higher ground" - the alters?? ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 14:37, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Maybe. Fingers crossed, but I think it is fixed. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 15:19, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"where 287 people drowned due to storm surge" - were all of the deaths due to storm surge? Or just most
- All it seems. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
" Initially, only eleven provinces were declared a state of emergency,[35] but by November 29, this total increased to 17" - use the same number format
- Good call. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]
"Around 11,000 lb (5,000 kg) of rice was withdrawn for uses in eight provinces" - what do you mean, withdrawn?
- Cleared up. Y E ^Pacific ^Hurricane 04:58, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Overall the article is in decent shape, but it needs some more loving before I pass the nomination. On hold for now. ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 03:59, 2 May 2015 (UTC)[reply]