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Talk:White Antelope (Cheyenne chief)/GA1

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Reviewer: Mike Christie (talk · contribs) 23:49, 27 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]

I'll review this. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 23:49, 27 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Images are appropriately licensed. Earwig finds no issues.

  • What makes cheyennelanguage.org a reliable source?
    • It's run by Chief Dull Knife College, as per the copyright notice, but I also don't see anything to indicate that it's particularly reliable. this source provides a different name of Wōkaī hwō'kō mǎs and (in a different place), Wō' kaī hwō'kō mǎ ǐs, so I don't really know what to use. Thoughts?
      I think I'd switch to that book -- I would imagine most of the differences are transliteration, and I see no reason to treat it as unreliable. If we can find a reliable modern source using a modern transliteration that would of course be better. Since there are two spellings, perhaps change the parenthesis to a footnote and give both? Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 12:59, 28 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]
  • "He made the final decision to end the battle with Little Old Man." Since there's no article for Little Old Man, I think we need to tell the reader who he is - a co-chief?
  • "At their second meeting, Hamilton later described his impression of White Antelope": Boggs only met him once, though, according to the preceding accounts.
  • "In 1864, John Chivington led the First Regiment of Colorado Volunteers began killing, according to historian Stan Hoig, any and all Cheyenne they came upon": looks like a word is missing?
    • Yes, added
  • "Hoig later writes that Chivington's meaning": this is historic present, but you use simple past everywhere else.
    • I tried to use historic present for historians, past for those who were roughly contemporary to the events written (I see "Hoig writes" or a variation several times, "Historian Ari Kelman writes", "Historian Gregory Michnig concludes",) are there instances I've missed.
      Yes, I missed those; probably sleepy again. Sorry! However, looking at those instances, I would suggest changing "later writes" to just "writes". Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 12:59, 28 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]

Spotchecks:

  • FN 23 cites "His body was found in the riverbed of Sand Creek": I don't have access to this; can you quote the supporting text?
    • It's actually at the very end of p. 74: ""several white soldiers witnessed White Antelope fighing and being killed in the creek bed, which is where his body was found."
  • FNs 12 & 15 cite "At the September meeting, Chivington made a statement that was interpreted by the Cheyenne and Arapaho as promising that his men would protect those who went in peace to Fort Lyon." Can you quote the support for this too?
    • Hoig: ""the chiefs appropriately considered Chivington's words to be a promise of protection if they would take their families in to fort lyon"". Michno is again about a page off-- p. 34: "the inference is crystal clear--if the Indians turned themselves over to the Fort Lyon Military they would be safe from attack by soldiers"
  • FN 3 cites "White Antelope later condemned the treaty as a "swindle", saying that his name had been added to the Treaty without his consent." Verified.

-- Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 01:49, 28 April 2023 (UTC)[reply]