Talk:Willow (song)/GA1
GA Review
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Reviewer: Kncny11 (talk · contribs) 19:03, 1 July 2021 (UTC)
Hello! I'll be reviewing this article as part of the July 2021 good article nominations backlog drive! Any section that I've marked with a Working tag means that I haven't finished leaving comments there, but you're free to begin making changes as soon as you see them! Kncny11 (shoot) 19:03, 1 July 2021 (UTC)
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Infobox and lede
[edit]- "percussions" → "percussion"
- In the lede, you mention that it topped Apple Music and Spotify charts, but this is never mentioned in the body
Background and release
[edit]- I don't love the placement of the block quote where it is. I think it would better be worked into the composition section
- WL the first instances of Folklore and Evermore in the body (I see Folklore is linked later, but it's mentioned in the first sentence)
- Similarly, mention earlier that Dessner was the producer for Folklore, so we understand his connection to the project
- Comma after "A video for the "Lonely Witch" version" and after "a video for the "Dancing Witch" version"
- Pipe "electronic" to electronic music
Composition
[edit]- Source for the "themes of hope using several metaphors" part
- Can you elaborate on how the lyrics reference those earlier songs?
Critical reception
[edit]- "in a The New York Times" reads awkwardly with the double article, it can be changed to "in a review of Evermore for The New York Times"
- I think there's a missing word in "one of the album's most flourishing music"
Commercial performance
[edit]- comma after "third number-one debut on the Hot 100"
- comma after "number 38 on the Hot 100"
- Accompanied by Evermore tracks "Champagne Problems" and "No Body, No Crime" at numbers 15 and 19 respectively, "Willow" constitutes Swift's 21 top-20 entries in the country. I'm not sure I follow this sentence
Music video
[edit]- examples of "familiar scenes from Swift's past"?
- comma after ""Before And After" video"
- "picking up where it left off" → "picking up where the former left off"
- I would prefer if, instead of having three citations at the end of each paragraph, individual sentences were sourced throughout the "synopsis and analysis" subhead so that each statement can be linked to a source backing it up
Awards and nominations
[edit]- There should be prose to accompany this section, even if it's a sentence or two about each nomination
Live performance
[edit]- Remove word "dreamy" as WP:NPOV
- A source mentioned that the performance was dreamy, so BawinV added quotes around it. D🐶ggy54321 (let's chat!) 19:40, 2 July 2021 (UTC)
Bottom matter
[edit]- Include links to the instruments and the production aspects. Let me know if you need any help with specific instrument links (for example, "percussion" should be linked to Percussion instrument)
- Cite Unseen and Headbomb are telling me that the Malaysia charts are an unreliable source, but I'm not sure I believe them
References
[edit]- I see you already added "|url-access=limited" for the Rolling Stone articles. In my experience (I use a paywall bypass and can't confirm on my end, shh), Rolling Stone would actually fall under "subscription" rather than "limited", whereas "limited" would apply to the NYT and WaPo sources
- In addition to the Malaysia chart mentioned earlier, two sources are marked as unreliable, but one is an album review and the other is an official music video that just happens to be taken from YT, so those are both fine in context
General comments
[edit]- It looks like some of the edit warring at the start of the month has smoothed itself over
- The pictures qualify for fair use. Please fill out the non-free use rationale for the music video screenshot in its entirety.
- Earwig score comes back low at 23.1%, however looking closely at some of the top matches, there's some close paraphrasing happening in the "Music video" section that will need to be reworded
Good start. Overall, I would say that the biggest items that need to be addressed are expansion of several points I elaborated on above, as well as the close paraphrasing in the Music video section. Since most of this is prose expansion, ping me when you've addressed the above points and I'll do another prose review. Putting formally on hold for now, and let me know if you have any questions! Kncny11 (shoot) 16:31, 2 July 2021 (UTC)
- @Kncny11: Hi! Thank you for your feedback. I read all the points you listed and fixed them all. BawinV (talk) 20:10, 2 July 2021 (UTC)
- BawinV Doggy54321 Thanks for the quick work! Two more very quick points:
- For [52], please change from all-caps to title case, per MOS:ALLCAPS
- Link "masterer" in the credits to Mastering (audio), just like in the background head
Once those are addressed, I'll be happy to pass the article! Kncny11 (shoot) 20:17, 2 July 2021 (UTC)
- @Kncny11: Fixed them both as well. Thank you for doing this; this is my first GA nomination. BawinV (talk) 20:40, 2 July 2021 (UTC)
- Yes, thank you so much! D🐶ggy54321 (let's chat!) 21:01, 2 July 2021 (UTC)
- BawinV Doggy54321 Awesome! Great job on the first GA, then! Kncny11 (shoot) 21:25, 2 July 2021 (UTC)
- Thank you so much for reviewing it! D🐶ggy54321 (let's chat!) 12:49, 3 July 2021 (UTC)
- BawinV Doggy54321 Awesome! Great job on the first GA, then! Kncny11 (shoot) 21:25, 2 July 2021 (UTC)