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Talk:Yield (album)/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Basilisk4u (talk · contribs) 15:09, 13 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Hi! I will review this article. Basilisk4u (talk) 15:09, 13 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

GA Review

[edit]
Lead
  • "Following a short tour for its previous album, No Code (1996), Pearl Jam went into the studio in 1997 to record its follow-up." This sentence could be a little more specific. Try "Following a short promotional tour for its previous album, No Code (1996), Pearl Jam recorded Yield throughout 1997 at Studio Litho and Studio X in Seattle, Washington."
  • "...marked a more collaborative effort on composition instead of giving too much work to frontman Eddie Vedder." --> "marked a more collaborative effort from the band as opposed to relying heavily on frontman Eddie Vedder to compose the songs."
  • "The band did more promotion for the album" The band did more promotion than what? Does this mean that the band promoted this album more than No Code? Clarify.
  • The lead could use more detail in general. It would be good to mention that it was Jack Irons last album with the band and explain some lyrical themes discussed in the album. Also, briefly explain where the promotional tours were and which song the band made a music video for.
Recording
  • "For its fifth album, Pearl Jam again worked with producer Brendan O'Brien." Mention how many previous albums O'Brien worked on with the band.
  • The last paragraph that talks about how the band did not work with O'Brien for several years after the album could probably be placed at the end of the first paragraph to maintain continuity.
  • "Compared with Vitalogy and No Code, Yield represented more of a team effort between all members of the group. The band even brought in Wendy Melvoin of Wendy & Lisa to add some guitar on several tracks." These sentences do not seem to be connected because it talks about how the members collaborated within the band, and then it mentions a collaboration with people from another group. "Compared with Vitalogy and No Code, Yield represented more of a team effort between all members of the group. The band also collaborated with Wendy Melvoin of Wendy & Lisa, who played guitar on several tracks." This sentence also needs a source, and you could also mention which songs he played guitar on.
Composition
  • "O'Brien said that the band made a conscious effort 'to really put together the best, most accessible songs they possibly could.'" Not sure if the quote is needed, it could be "O'Brien noted that during the Yield sessions, the band made a conscious effort to create more accessible songs."
  • The quote from Vedder in the second paragraph is extremely long. I think that you could sum it up as "Vedder explained that the songs express positivity as opposed to the band's more angst-ridden previous albums, citing a more mature worldview" and cut out a lot of the actual quote.
  • The third paragraph relies too heavily on quotes. Try paraphrasing them.
Packaging
  • Because this section also discusses the album's title, I think the section should be called "Packaging and artwork"
  • "The cover of the cassette version has slightly different artwork, moving the yield sign from the right of the road to the left side and reversing the picture of the road." I think you could call it a mirror image.
  • "Regarding the liner notes art, there is a yield sign hidden in every picture in the booklet." --> "A yield sign hidden in every picture in the booklet of the liner notes."
Release and reception
  • Looks great :)
Tour
  • "The North American summer tour was a big success" In what way?
References
  • Make sure that all citations have publication information

On hold

[edit]

First of all, I am extremely sorry for the delay. I became very busy with midterms and completely forgot about the review. Thanks for reminding me :) I have now put the review on hold for concerns to be addressed. Basilisk4u (talk) 03:04, 24 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

It now looks like all of the problems have been fixed! Great work. I am happy to pass the article now. Basilisk4u (talk) 16:09, 24 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]