User:BozMo/Trinity Mallard

FAQ

What was the story with the Trinity Mallard;

As far as I know

(1) The original Mallards private dining society was formed by a group of boat club members and mathematicians around 1981. It was formed to celebrate the fact that a mathematician called Paul Doust drugged a mallard duck with ether soaked bread (the trick is to get between the duck and the water when it gets sleepy) and then released it from a bag into the Matric feast during the master's speech. It flew into the painting of Henry the Eighth behind the Master's head. I think that was in 1981 but it may have been earlier I wasn't up then. Someone called Phil Hogg (or similar name) may have been the ringleader.

My brother was a friend of Paul Doust and one of the original members and I was invited to join when I came up in 1983. About 50 people used to go to the dinners

(2) Sir Francis was a decoy duck bought by Paul Doust as a mascot at the start. The first one was then "lost" I think by Toby Robinson (I think it ended up in use on his uncle's farm or something like that) and replaced by Paul Doust with another decoy duck version which this time he marked to ensure future identity. The second incarnation I stole from a table at the end of a dinner (the club met about twice a year) and hid before I was caught. At that stage (must be 1985 I think) I had already acquired a set of college master keys (they were hand ground from strip brass using an electric drill after borrowing locks overnight to template them; it took a long vac residence) and I was involved in roof climbing. Duncan Harris and I entered Hall in the middle of the night (we had the hand ground fellows key which let us in via the Neville's Court door so did not need to use the gallery route). Duncan did safety ropes and I climbed straight up the panelling on the right side of the hall to reach the bottom of the beams, and then climbed up the beams to the top arch. The rope was secured at interval and Duncan belayed up. It was remarkably dirty up there. I placed Sir Francis complete with a sign underneath on the top arch. As usual everyone knew who had done it but no one minded (although Hugh Osborn told me a consensus amongst fellows was that the duck could stay but the sign had to go). In those days when people locked themselves out at night the Porters used to send them to me to open their door lock, as unofficially everyone knew these things. It was all part of life. At the next dinner when asked to explain my actions I gave a speech poetically based on a parody of "you are old Father William" declaring that Sir Francis had been taken into care after being sexually abused by Paul Doust, and was forgiven. I may still have a copy of the speech somewhere.

Later that year, taking advantage of the fact I was on top of the lantern on top of hall roof attaching some fishing wire for another operation (and so I would get caught first), another mathematician called Adam Chalcraft went into Hall through the traditional balcony route and removed the sign, moving the duck to another location on the left hand side of the roof. He is around to talk to, I have an email. He was a juggler and threw a bean bag right up through the archway. I assume he used Prusik knots but he was not accompanied. That decoy duck was removed by workmen refurbishing a couple of years later. The Mallards dining society stopped when Paul Doust left.

Subsequent ducks etc were not down to me. It was a reincarnation of a legend.