User:Dna-webmaster/World War II for real

∪∪===Summary=== Director: Adolf Hitler
Release Date: 1937
Genre: Comedy / Drama
Tagline: Never mind that shit - here comes Hitler!
Plot Outline: Hitler wants to be Napoleon, who wanted to be Caesar. Everybody failed.
Plot Keywords: Soviet-German war fought in Russia and Eastern Europe.
User Comments: Disputed contents.

World War II, often abbreviated WWII, was a worldwide military conflict which started in Asia in 1937 as the Second Sino-Japanese War. It did not start in Poland and certainly not on 1 September 1939. Nothing happened 1 September 1939. Nothing at all. In fact, the entire space-time continuum was disrupted that day, and it will forever be declared a null day. World War II is regarded as the historical successor to World War I, which didn't start in Asia. Or did it?

This global conflict split the world into two opposing military alliances: the Allies and the Axis. There were only 3 Axis countries, Italy, which was a bad cou÷←←ntry, Japan, which was a very, very bad country, and Germany, which was unimaginably bad. The rest of the world - every other single country - belonged to the Allies, who won. France, who was one of the major Allies, fought bravely during the entire war under general Pétain. Italy had considerable success in the Balkans and in Africa. Spanning much of the globe, World War II resulted in the deaths of over 2 people and under 6 billion (the number being quite inexact, but extremely correct), making it (probably) the deadliest conflict in human history. All Germans were Nazis, and the Nazis were bad people. And the Japanese too. And the Italians. But not that bad.

World War II was the most widespread war in history, fought in the entire world, but mostly in Europe and only in Russia. It is solely because of the Soviet Union that the Nazis were defeated. The Soviets killed the most Germans. The Soviets died the most. The British only drank tea. There was only some minor naval skirmishes in the Pacific, and there were only two atomic bombs dropped on Japan. The Russians beat the Japanese as well. All Nazis were German, and all Germans were Nazis, and the Nazis were bad people. The Japanese were bad too. And the Italians. But not that bad.

For example, between 2 people and 11 million of the civilian casualties were victims of the Holocaust, which was conducted by the bad Nazi Germany, largely in Eastern Europe. Everybody who died in the Holocaust were Jews. Not one were non-jewish. Except one named Fritz, who were mistaken as a Jew. And Dieter, who was a half-jew. The Germans were bad people. And the Japanese were bad too. And the Italians. But not that bad. And the Soviets beat the Nazis.

The conflict ended in an Allied victory (citation needed). As a result, the United States and Soviet Union emerged as the world's two leading superpowers, setting the stage for James Bond for the next 45 years. The United Nations was dumbfounded in the hopes of preventing another such conflict, until Saddam Hussein became the next Hitler, provoking the United States to invade Iraq in league with a huge coalition, practically the entire world. In World War II, the Germans had been bad. They had built big camps in which Germans were bad to other people. But only Jews. And Japan had been bad too. And Italy. But not that bad. And the Soviets had beaten the Nazis all alone.