This page contains material that is kept because it is considered humorous. Such material is not meant to be taken seriously.
Wikipedia is no place for humour. Everything is very serious here and we are all terrifically important.
This page in a nutshell: Inside a real nutshell you won't be able to read this user page. Perhaps you should leave the nutshell and try again. If you insist on staying in a nutshell (for whatever reason), go grab a nutcracker.