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User:Kalapulla123

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Welcome to my English user page.

I am Kalapulla [ˈkɑlɑˌpulːɑ], an expert on all things classical, a self-declared poet, your average David Lynch enjoyer, and a walking library of knowledge[1] who prefers to speak the Anglo-Saxon tongue with an outrageous British accent[2] and a gentle Swedish touch, even though he can't properly speak the latter.

I am a very busy person, and I try to use as much time as I can making Wikipedia a better place. Most of my activities happen in the Finnish-language Wikipedia.

I may spend too much time here. This is where most of the fun in my life happens.[3]

...And I've just realized that my username probably needs some kind of an explanation for those who do not speak the Great Language of Kalevala. I think it has something to do with a certain food...[4]

If you have any complaints, please fill out our complaint form and place it in an envelope addressed to the name of the hospital in which you were born.[5]

For futher information, please visit my Finnish user page.

Please don't read this

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Please do not click this citation.[6]

Endnotes

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  1. ^ I deny the presumption that this is self-adoration. It is only a name bestowed upon me by a dear friend on a luncheon with a Lutheran priest in Sweden.
  2. ^ In reality, my accent is more close to a Transatlantic accent than a truly British one.
  3. ^ I know. It's kinda sad, actually.
  4. ^ If you really want to know, I recommend you to try and Find the Fish.
  5. ^ This is satire. For more, please check America's Finest News Source.
  6. ^ Please do not go to my sandbox.