Frequently asked questions

Question (Q): Why lotusmaglite, and why do you refuse to capitalize it?

Answer (A): It's my second-oldest online handle, and it comes from the desire to juxtapose two metaphorical objects that describe my modus operandi: the search for that which is rare, fragile, beautiful, and steeped in mystique, and the need to occasionally wield a blunt instrument. As for the lowercase spelling, I just find that it irritates purists.

Q: What brought you to Wikipedia?

A: My unquenchable thirst for irrelevant information. Okay, I also like the idea of a community-based repository of knowledge. 21st century heretics, each and every one of us.

Q: Who are The Scholars of Hap, and what is the OPM?

A: That's two questions, you big cheater. The Scholars of Hap are the central figures in the Order of the Poly-Moniker (OPM), an academic society of guerilla ontologists and discontented philosophers.

Q: How are you today?

A: Well, that is a frequently asked question. Fine, thank you.

Q: Do you really think people will believe that someone other than yourself is asking these questions?

A: Our name is Legion, for we are many.