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User:Zaid Alkh/Pangolin trade/Pfeifkat000 Peer Review

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General info

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Whose work are you reviewing?

Zaid Alkh

Link to draft you're reviewing
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/User:Zaid%20Alkh/Pangolin_trade?veaction=edit&preload=Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org_draft_template
Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
Pangolin trade

Evaluate the drafted changes

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(Compose a detailed peer review here, considering each of the key aspects listed above if it is relevant. Consider the guiding questions, and check out the examples of what feedback looks like.)


Thus far, this is more of a general article review, as there isn't a student draft as of 3/3/23.


Lead:


The lead paragraphs are concise, cover the main content in the article body, and are generally well-written. Extra editing might not be needed, unless you decide to add sections within the article body.


Content:


Reading through the article, there seems to be a stronger emphasis placed on the "Africa" section, especially the medicinal/non-medicinal uses of pangolins. In order to maintain a better balance throughout the article, these groups of content could be made more concise. Additionally, the verbiage regarding the use of pangolins as medicine could be more carefully crafted, so that it comes across more neutrally (at times, it is unclear if the traditional medical uses of pangolin are "right/wrong" etc.).

It also might be interesting to include information about pangolin trade on other continents and places (South America, India, etc.), rather than limiting the specifics to Africa and Asia.


References:


While many of the references are from peer-reviewed resources, there are also a significant amount from news/press media. This could be contributing to some slightly biased language in the article; in order to address this, it might be worth your time to look through the existing sources that link to news or press articles (particularly those used in the last section on conservation).