User talk:Zangermonger

Cummilism: The prophets

Cummalism was created in December 2005 by Matthew Banning, Josh Ladd, and Hayley Sandgren. The three philosophers got together one day and started to discuss religion. The three decided that they needed a stable religion, one with all the right morals because the religions of this world seemed to lack answers to important ethical questions and contridicted itself time and time again. It was then that they saw a spirit who told them the others who claimed to be prophets got the story wrong and mixed in their own opinions. The humans then had been too stupid to understand anything, but humans have evolved so they finaly have the right capabilities to understand. God is not the name of the deity we worship, it is Gawd and he is, in fact, male. We are to refer to him as Father Gawd. And so it was then that the three philosophers became the first three prophets of Cummalism.

The Name

Cummalism was chosen as the name because of the latin word "Cum", which means "with." "al" was added in because of the greek word for "other". Then, "ism" is the clasic suffix for relgions. So, in lamest terms, Cummalism is "With other religion". The followers would be known as the people of Cummalism, or Cummalots for short.

Creation Myth

According to the Cummalots, the earth was always here, and in fact, was Father Gawd's wife, and her name was Mother Earth. Father Gawd supposedly stuck his "tool in her volcano" which made an eruption of lava everywhere. Before the lava could cool, Father Gawd formed the still hot liquid into a shape, and when that shape hardened he and Mother Earth decided it would be their child and gave it the breathe of life. This first person's name was Sam, and Sam was a hermaphrodite, both male and female. Father Gawd allowed her to become pregnant and she had twins, born exactly at the same time, and their names were Tony and Gertrude. Tony was only male and Gertrude was only female. They were the first man and woman on the Earth.

The Gospel

The Cummalot Gospel is still being written by the three prophets, but expects to be written by the end of 2006. This book will be available online, for as Matthew Banning claims, "Relgion should be free. Why should those who believe in the true god, our Father Gawd, have to pay to practice their beliefs?" A shrine has been set up for Cummalism, but funds are still needed to purchase a building to establish "The First Church That Doesn't Lie"