Wikipedia:Requests for feedback/2011 January 21

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I need feedback on this sandbox article so I can have it posted. Thanks, Vso737 (talk) 04:47, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]


Vso737 (talk) 04:47, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Kamalpankaj (talk) 07:56, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Untitledhttp://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yeow_Chai_Thiam[edit]

I have sourced all of this article, except I cannot find online sources to support that Yeow was a State Minister for Health. I am certain that he was, people from Negeri Sembilan and especially Port Dickson always tell me he was a State Health Minister. Is Malaysia's State Parliament perhaps too small to have online coverage?

Thanks for the help, this is my first article!

Patriot100 (talk) 08:12, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

As this is my first time creating a Wikipedia article, please help to review it to see if it is ready for publishing. Thank you.


Erchiangkai (talk) 10:49, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I would like to know the quality of the article I have created. Please let me know where I went wrong and how I can improve..


Suraj (talk) 10:51, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Looks pretty good.
I have a couple of minor points.
  • Your opening sentence has parentheses within parentheses. Per Manual of Style, one set should be changed to square brackets, although I personally do not like that look. Consider whether it could be written differently to avoid nested parentheses.
  • I made some minor changes to the numbers to conform to the Manual of Style
  • I removed bold from "Nila Maadam", "Garden of Excellence Award" and "The World Federation of Rose Societies". I don't believe it is warranted. It is possible the award and the society should have some other punctuation (perhaps italic?). Please take a look at the Manual of Style to see if it is covered.--SPhilbrickT 14:14, 22 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks a lot SPhilbrick. --Suraj (talk) 03:55, 27 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I wopuld like to know the quality of this article I created. Please help me improve.


Suraj (talk) 10:55, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

This article has been proposed for deletion once. I have reverted it and i'm working on the article. I would like to know the problems with the article and how i can improve it.


Suraj (talk) 11:02, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Full article submitted primarily for review.

217.33.71.188 (talk) 12:12, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Well, this looks pretty good. I'm surprised there wasn't an article on it previously. A couple of points, which I'll take care of once I've written them down here (otherwise I'll forget).
  • You've left an external link to [www.example.com]
  • The citations are just the website link. if you use the {{cite web}} template, you'll have a much more informative link.
  • The Booksellers links don't seem to work...
Nothing major, just those little tweaks you hit. Worm 13:11, 25 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I would like general feedback on this proposed article that I have just written. I am a new user.

Phil Stoltzfus (talk) 12:22, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Another Project Gutenberg author missing an article. Sutphen (1861–1945) has two works on Project Gutenberg, including an early piece of post-apocalyptic fiction set in New York in 2015. So if 2012 doesn't happen, here's how to find out what's next. Comments welcome.


Tkotc (talk) 18:07, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Hi, Please help me review this article. Thanks.

Lyn online (talk) 18:22, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

User:Jamshid Arian Assl[edit]

Jamshid Arian Assl (talk) 19:02, 21 January 2011 (UTC) negin ahmadi[reply]

The article was nominated for deletion and after due consideration the decision was reached to delete it (18 January 2011). Please see deletion discussion. I think you will have to take this up under a Wikipedia:Deletion review if you desire to further pursue this article. Tkotc (talk) 18:02, 22 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

There have been several other users editing this page, so just sending this in for a more official review.


Earlymind (talk) 19:10, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I thought your article was very well done. I removed the "Unreviewed Article" tag. Personally I would move the Maui reference so that the reference is next to the city, but the way you have it isn't wrong. Tkotc (talk) 18:16, 22 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

125.21.211.14 (talk) 19:48, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

This is my first article. It is about the Firecracker Press, a letterpress shop in St. Louis, Missouri. I would like feedback before submitting this.


Smokebomb (talk) 20:48, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Maxine Virtual Machine my first page; brief description of my project at Oracle Labs, all material original[edit]

I'm looking for a review of this, my first page. It describes briefly a piece of established open source software sponsored by Oracle Labs, with links to the project's home page and links to related projects.

MLVDV (talk) 21:58, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Just created this article and trying to make sure it's well written and meets all criteria. It's about the writer Robert Duncan. I'd like to add an image, but I'm a little unsure on this process. If I took or own the photo, how do I prove that I have the rights to it? Thanks.

Moegadishu (talk) 23:50, 21 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]