Talk:Hurricane Paul (2012)/GA1

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GA Review[edit]

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Reviewer: Hurricanehink (talk · contribs) 16:42, 4 July 2014 (UTC)[reply]


  • "The sixteenth tropical cyclone, tenth hurricane, and fifth major hurricane of the season" link which season. You clarify it's 2012 in the previous sentence, so you could just pipe it if you want
  • "several hundred miles south of the coastline of Mexico on October 13" - since it's the lead and you don't have to go into too much detail, why not "south of the Mexican coast on October 13"?
  • Add SSHS when you say "Category 3 hurricane" in the lead
  • You should mention in the lead when and where Paul made its closest point of approach to land. In the MH paragraph of the lead, you just say "land interaction"
  • "and remained poorly organized across the remainder of its trek across the Caribbean Sea and Central America" - avoid saying "across" twice. The second one should be "through"
  • Is all of the beginning of the 3rd MH paragraph really cited to ref 8? It doesn't say anything about it becoming TS Paul six hours after designation, and it doesn't say that the upper-level low put a break in the ridge.
  • "In addition, a series of microwave passes late in evening" - what is a microwave pass? Did the storm go into a microwave? And what evening?
  • Either mention SSHS when you say "Category 1 hurricane", or just say "Paul was upgraded to hurricane status"
  • "Cabo San Lucas, Mexico." - so, the first time you mention CSL, you don't say Mexico, but the second time you do. Try switching that around+
  • "Punta Eugenia" link
  • "Paul was upgraded to a major hurricane, Category 3 on the Saffir-Simpson Hurricane Wind Scale, the fifth of the season, at 1800 UTC" - on what day?!
  • Could you say how close Paul passed within the Baja California peninsula as a tropical cyclone?
  • Watch for overlinking in the preps section
  • "1.98 in (50 mm) fell" - of what? Cake?!
  • "Roughly 500 residents in Comondú were evacuated to shelter." - why isn't this in the preps section?
  • "In Loreto, significant destruction occurred and many residents were rendered homeless. Two creeks overflowed their banks, destroying several homes." - why not mention this when you already mention the damage in Loreto?
  • " due to a combination of nearly a years worth" - it should be year's
  • Can the 4th and 5th impact paragraphs be merged with the third one?
  • "A total of 495 people were taken to shelters, including 93 in Ciudad Insurgentes and 300 in San Carlos." - again, why no preps?
    • Looking at the article, it appears it wasn't. I say "were taken" for a reaosn :P YE Pacific Hurricane 17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • MX2 - MX$2

All in all, pretty good read! ♫ Hurricanehink (talk) 16:42, 4 July 2014 (UTC)[reply]