Grassy Knollington

Grassy Knollington is a character in the British adult comic Viz of whom it can be fairly said, no one gives a rat's ass.

A schoolboy with huge glasses and a wild tuft of black hair, Grassy is obsessed with conspiracy theories, as is implied by his name, a play on the term "The Grassy Knoll", the alleged location of a second shooter in the Kennedy assassination.

Incredibly minor incidents inspire paranoid suspicion in Grassy Knollington and before anyone can stop him he starts hunting through the school library or Googling around on the internet, drawing far-reaching conclusions from meaningless coincidences and concluding that he has found some sort of global conspiracy, one that is invariably intent on some nefarious activity.

For example, in one strip, Grassy Knollington — whilst reading "The Da Vinci Code" - witnesses his father slip up on a walnut. Convinced that this was a failed assassination attempt on his dad's life, Grassy begins his investigations, convinced that there was more than one walnut involved in his father's accident ("The lone nut theory may have fooled the Warren Commission, but it cuts no ice with me.")

Based on the fact that his father works as a cleaner at McDonalds, Grassy's investigations lead to him concluding that McDonalds, the Freemasons and George W. Bush are in league with each other in a plot to create the antichrist that will further the aims of the Illuminati shape-shifting lizards who run America.

The punchline is that Grassy Knollington's theories invariably turn out to be completely accurate. In several strips this results in him being assassinated, but he is always resurrected in time for the next issue.

External links

• Flash scan of strip from Viz website: Grassy Knollington