Brainiac: Science Abuse

Brainiac: Science Abuse
Genre	Pseudoscience/Comedy Entertainment/Documentary
Presented by	Richard Hammond (Series One to Four) Vic Reeves (Series Five onwards) Jon Tickle Charlotte Hudson
Country of origin	United Kingdom
Production
Producer	Granada Productions
Running time	60 or 30 minutes
Original release
Network	Sky One
Release	Thursday November 13, 2003
Related
Brainiac: History Abuse Brainiac's Test Tube Baby

Brainiac: Science Abuse (often shortened to simply Brainiac) is a British entertainment TV show with a pseudoscientific motif, aimed at a primarily male audience. As the show focuses on entertainment at the expense of using even basic elements of the scientific method the "experiments" conducted during the production of the Brainiac: Science Abuse TV Show are of no scientific value.

The show centralises along the three main cores of "science" for all key stages in British education including chemistry, physics and biology (to a lesser extent) harnessing these via a more entertaining approach. The show depicts researchers who are capable of thinking in a more lateral way. It is broadcast in the UK and the Republic of Ireland on Sky One and Sky One HD (then repeated on Sky Two and Sky Three). It is made by Granada Productions. It is also shown in the US on the cable network G4TV, in New Zealand on TV2, in Germany on DMAX (synchronized), in Thailand on True Visions True X-Zyte, in Israel on Channel 8 (ערוץ 8), in Singapore on Arts Central, and in European countries (and South Africa) on Discovery Channel. In Greece it is shown on Skai TV, a channel having signed a programming deal with Discovery Channel. It was also shown in Singapore on MediaCorp TV's Arts Central. Season One was aired by Network Ten in Australia in 2005, who have now started rerunning it.

The original presenters were Richard Hammond and Jon Tickle (formerly of Big Brother). In the second series, Charlotte Hudson joined Hammond and Tickle to bring the total number of hosts up to 3. Hammond left after the fourth series, and was replaced by Vic Reeves. The show's fifth series first aired on May 8, 2007

The show refers to people who examine and test the experiments as Brainiacs. Each episode would finish with the team blowing up a caravan. This could be related to Richard Hammond's Top Gear heritage, on which caravans have regularly been destroyed - used as a target for a compressed air powered car-catapult and conkers being played with two caravans held up by cranes.

Show ratings

The programme has had huge ratings and has been a creative success for Sky and is now one of their flagship programmes and regular recommissions. The original programme, a sister programme, Brainiac: History Abuse, presented by Charlotte Hudson, began on Sky One on 1 June 2004, and a live version, Brainiac's Test Tube Baby, was broadcast alongside the fourth series.The 4th series was shown in 2006.

Taglines

Every show starts with the host saying "This is Brainiac, the (science) show...

-"...that does for science what a lit fuse does for dynamite."

-"...that puts an itchy rash on the buttocks of science."

-"...where we blow stuff up in search of big answers....but mostly, just for the hell of it."

-"...that had proof of the Roswell aliens... but taped football over it...."

-"...where we blow stuff up, and have a good look inside."

-"...where we lob dangerous chemicals around, and run like hell."

-"...that rings the doorbell of science, and then runs away."

-"...that doesn't listen to its mummy."

-"...that puts science in tight underpants, and gives it a wedgie."

-"...that Albert Einstein would've invented - if he wasn't so thick."

-"...where we pull down the pants of science and have a good laugh at its bits."

-"...which, if you invite it around for Sunday lunch, would play footsie with your mum."

-"...that comes home late, and wakes the neighbors."

-"...that orders a vindaloo and then demands more cheese."

-"...that crashes the party, drinks the beer and wees on the sofa."

-"...that winds up science until the veins throb in its neck."

-"...that wipes its nose on the sleeve of science."

-"...where we light the fuse... and then leg it."

-"...where we poke our nose into other people's business."

-"...that does for science what five pints of lager does for ugly women."

-"...that doesn't curtsy to the queen."

-"...that's a bit like GCSE Physics. Well, with more girls in bikinis and less physics."

-"...that's funded entirely by Hillbillies."

-"...that plays kiss-chase with science."

-"...your mum warned you about."

-"...that wakes up next to science in the morning, and can't remember it's name."

-"...that never wipes it's feet before stepping on your granny's new carpet."

-"...that does for science what a milkmaid does for udders."

Music

Main Article: Music in Brainiac: Science Abuse

Brainiac has many popular songs and pieces of music played in every episode including hits by Britney Spears, C & C Music Factory, Elton John, and many others. Some songs are themes of various recurring segments such as There's No One Quite like Grandma sung by the St Winifred's School Choir for the Granny Brainiac segments in Series 3

History

First Series

Series 1 of Brainiac hit the British small screen in 2003 on Sky One, a UK subscription-based television channel from the digital satellite broadcaster BSkyB. It featured a wide variety of experiments including testing to see whether a mobile phone would ignite petrol vapors, walking on custard and testing the effects of electric shocks on various Brainiacs.

Second Series

The second series premiered on Sky One in 2004. It saw the start of "Brainiac Snooker", in which World Snooker professional Quinten Hann would pot the last six balls on a table (Yellow, Green, Brown, Blue, Pink and Black) into the pocket causing the caravan rigged with a different explosive to explode. It premiered in the US on G4 on 29 August 2005 as part of the Midnight Spank programming block; and is also shown on VIVA in Germany, JIMtv in Belgium, Veronica and Discovery Channel in the Netherlands, Network Ten in Australia, TV2 in New Zealand, and Arts Central in Singapore, Discovery Channel in Scandinavia, Discovery Channel in Romania and Nelonen in Finland. The second series also introduced Charlotte Hudson as a third, but minor, host. It also saw the introduction of what then became long term character "Professor Myang-Li", played by Rachel Grant.

Brainiac recording on location

Third Series

The third series premiered on Sky One on 25 August 2005. It featured Brainiac Golf (much like Brainiac Snooker, only this time with different salts to colour the explosions), Lad v. Lass, Thermite, Does being electrocuted affect your ability at work (human statue, flair bartending, darts player), Things the instruction manuals don't warn you about, 47 Second Science, Diana Ross and her Chain Reaction, and testing which things break and which things bounce after a ten foot drop. Dr. John P. Kilcoyne, associate dean of the University of Sunderland had a regular slot where he mixed various chemicals to see whether they Fizz or Bang. The third series premiered on G4 as part of the Midnight Spank block in Spring of 2006.

Fourth Series

The fourth series premiered on Sky One on 16 July 2006. It introduced Brainiac Darts, where Bobby George threw a perfect set, always finishing on the Double Top which triggered the explosion of a caravan, and a new "I Can Do Science Me" which is set around auditions. There is also a feature called "Things What My Body Does" in which a member of the public is filmed doing something extraordinary with their bodies. The first three were: a woman making a very odd "rumbling" noise with her tongue, a man with his hands together smoothly waving his fingers and another man moving his eyebrows in a "Lively" way. It also introduced a new feature called "Brainiac for a Day" where contestants could bring an item of their choice to blow up. It was set out as a game show with the hosts Dolly Girl and Dolly Boy. The fourth series premiered on G4 as part of the Midnight Spank block in Spring of 2007.

Fifth Series

It premiered on 8 May 2007 on Sky One. The production of the series was undertaken by Granada Productions and was simulcast in HD on Sky One HD.

In Series 5 Vic Reeves took over as host from Richard Hammond. This was announced before Hammond's car accident in September 2006. The series retained Braniac For A Day, Things What My Body Does, and contains new segments like Brainiac V Beast, Dr Kilcoyne with "Fizzle or Flash" and Myang Lee with steel balls, attempting to "shatter or shunt" various objects.

With Vic now presenting, he introduced the "alternative humour" brand that Vic was famous for in the 1990s with his comedy partner, Bob Mortimer.

Change of Hosts

Richard Hammond presented until series four, when he quit the show. There were reports that he didn't turn up to filming for up to a week, because he no longer wished to do the show. However, as his contract stated he had to complete the whole series, he recorded only the voice-over work for the remaining episodes - possibly the reason for this series running shorter than any other to date. Vic Reeves was brought in as replacement host shortly after the end of the Fourth Series.

Experiments

The presenters perform unusual "experiments" or demonstration procedures "so you don't have to". The destruction of caravans is a recurring theme in many of the episodes. These experiments are often non-scientific and are undertaken in the interests of entertainment (many involving large explosions) rather than any science. The show does however do a reasonable job of demonstrating some simple concepts of experimental design.

• Liquid Nitrogen Time: Vic Reeves does a (bad) impression of a Russian scientist named Uri Abusikov inserting an object into liquid nitrogen to see what happens to it.
• At what point does "a bit" become "a lot" ?
• Safe-cracking (involving methods such as acid, explosives, and a Challenger 2 Tank)
• Things not to put into a microwave oven. (Hammond says: "The following experiment is dangerous so for your safety and others around you do not try this at home... No really, don't." Reeves says: "The following experiment is dangerous, do not try this at home... Or anywhere else for that matter.")
• Celebs on Helium - celebrities are invited to take a balloon of helium and say "Hi, I'm ... and you're watching Brainiac!"
• Attempting to destroy a black box, which is in fact yellow. A follow-up to Safe-cracking, a flight data recorder is subjected to various abuses attempting to destroy it, such as having a group of American Civil War reenactors open fire with rifles and cannons, dunking it in a vat of acid, and spraying it with napalm and finally succumbing to a garbage dump compacter used to crush cars.
• Walking across (and standing in) a swimming-pool full of custard to demonstrate the properties of a non-Newtonian fluid.
• Does being happy enhance your (mental) performance?
• Which fruit floats? (A segment famously rife with repeated double entendres concerning its host. Usually done over ad breaks.
• What's this? A sample from an object has been magnified 25-450 times under a microscope and you have to guess what the object is. Also usually done over ad breaks.
• Comparing the effects of what would happen (advantages and disadvantages) in given situations:
  • To a fat guy vs. a thin guy.
  • To a tall guy vs. a short guy.
  • To a male vs. a female.
  • To a brainiac vs. a beast
• Situations where it's better to be either tired or wired (=having a high level of caffeine).
• Investigating the propulsive possibilities of CO₂ Fire extinguishers.
• Office Buoyancy Aids - testing which items in an office work best as flotation aids in the event of the sea level rising.
• Things Jon Tickle's body can't do.
• Things Jon Tickle's body can do.
• "Tickle's Teasers", supposedly unanswerable questions.
• Things you can't do while being electrified.
• Things you can do with Thermite.
• 47 second science: Tackling life's big questions in bite sized chunks
• Granny Brainiac: Home spun cures from an old woman that Brainiac calls "the nation's favourite old dear."
• Will it break or will it bounce? Dropping things from a height and seeing if they will break or bounce.
• Pub Science - performing experiments in a pub with ordinary items. Invariably this results in the experimenter (Dr. Bunhead) being thrown out by security staff and banned. (What they usually say is "To "pub science", get out of it"!)
• At Home with Dr. Bunhead - household mayhem usually involving some explosive chemical reaction.
• You Can't Stop Rock 'n' Roll - a boombox is subjected to various forms of violence (such as having a caravan dropped on it and being burned with a flamethrower) until it ceases to play a tape of the Twisted Sister song of the same name. You Can't Stop Rock 'n' Roll was never actually played. The tape never survives.
• Funfair physics - investigating things such as what is the scariest ride, if centrifugal force stops you being splashed by a drink on a roller-coaster loop-the-loop and finding the best/fastest way to slide down a giant slide.
• Domestic Disasters: Things they don't say in the instruction manual - e.g., they don't tell you not to put dangerous chemicals in an appliance, but Brainiac shows you why they should. E.g.: Plastic explosives in a toaster, nitroglycerin in a spin dryer, Potassium in a washing machine, and a fire extinguisher in an oven (which, ironically, causes the oven to explode in a fireball).
• Blowing up pretty much anything - but preferably caravans.
• 101 Uses for a Wee - 'practical applications' for urine.
• Tina Turner and her Bunsen Burner - A rather obvious impersonator of pop star Tina Turner "takes a break" from show business to do explosive science with her Bunsen burner "like she did in her lab in Nutbush", and with any type of explosives such as gunpowder that she needs to destroy her choice of a coloured car; she lights it up with her burner and waits until it becomes a metal burning fireball.
• Producing improvised "armour" using ordinary household items (such as pillows, toilet seats and woks) and testing their durability against weapons such as the slingshot, longbow and crossbow in the event that your house is under siege by "nutters".
• Is it possible for a weakling to be turned into a hardman in a couple of hours?
• "I can do Science, me." A fan could send over a question and it would be answered.
• Explosive of the Week - Brainiac beauties use different types of explosives on different objects and have three of their friends rate the blast on a scale of 1 to 10.
• Diana Ross and her Chain Reaction- Yet another rather obvious impersonator, as "Diana Ross" finds joy in starting off chain reactions which result in the explosive destruction of a car.
• Does eating only fish for a month make you clever? (The Brainiac showed a small but notable increase in his I.Q. score, however, this may be due to a different test being used each time to ensure validity.)
• Dr. Bunhead on the road - Dr Bunhead drives to a school in his ice-cream truck (Dr. Bunheads Ices) and when the schoolchildren come to buy icecreams from him, he denies that it's an icecream truck, and then takes out two random chemicals, and mixes them together. The result is mayhem.
• Brainiac Snooker - A Brainiac goes head to head against snooker player Quinten Hann. Every time a ball is pocketed, it sets off a fuse, which ignites a caravan filled with a unique gas, such as propane, butane, or pure oxygen.
• Peter Logan's Exploding Paste, where one of the Brainiac staff, Peter Logan, plays pranks on co-workers using a very mildly explosive material, made from iodine crystals and "one other secret ingredient" according to the show. The "secret ingredient" is really household ammonium hydroxide. The resulting combination is nitrogen triiodide.
• Which Household oil is the slipperiest - the battle between cod liver oil, baby oil and sunflower oil to see which oil really is the slipperiest down a 25ft slope
• Does looking at the breasts of an attractive girl for 30 minutes work out your heart as much as 30 minutes of exercise?
• Adding alkali metals rubidium and caesium to water.
• Will it Fizz or Bang? - Mixing two or more substances together to see if it will fizz or explode. The most recent series has seen this replaced by "Fizzle or Flash?", which is much the same principle.
• Is it better to eat dog food or junk food for a week?
• Does having sex before playing a game of football improve your game?
• Can you swim faster in syrup than you do in water?
• Can the viewer spot the deliberately made goofs or hidden secrets in one episode? Hammond deliberately made colour changes and visual changes in one whole episode. At the end, he explained it to the viewer, finishing with "and yes, my clothes did change three times in that last bit."
• Brown note, can a sound at the right frequency make you defecate?
• How loud a noise is made when a skip/dumpster, filled with various items (ie: dishes) is dropped from a great height?
• Does eating various foods change the smell of your urine?
• Will it Glow or Blow? - Tests consisting of a combination of two substances to see if they Glow or Blow.
• Movie Stars Destroying Cars - in Series 4, this segment featured famous Hollywood actors (or rather, people dressed up to merely look like them) destroying a car of their choice. They would arrive in a limo to a host of screaming "fans", and then press a gold star on a barrel to set off the explosion.

See also

• Brainiac: History Abuse

External links

• Brainiac at IMDb
• Guardian column on faking of "experiments" on Brainiac
• US release of Brainiac
• Unofficial Polish forum
• ShedinSpace