Squash (professional wrestling)
In professional wrestling, a squash is an extremely one-sided match; one performer is booked as far superior to his opponent, completely dominates his opponent during the course of the match and defeats his opponent with virtually no resistance. A squash is often a short match, but it doesn't have to be; the defining characteristic of a squash match is not its length but its booking, in which one performer is booked as destroying another quickly and easily, not out of luck or opportunism, but due to his inherent and completely overwhelming superior skill.
Squash matches were the almost exclusive content of syndicated wrestling shows through the 1980s and 1990s. The WWF and WCW aired several shows weekly that consisted mostly of various wrestlers fighting unknown jobbers, usually to help get a gimmick or moveset over.
Today, such squash matches are often used to portray a larger wrestler as an unstoppable monster heel. One current example is Umaga, whom WWE established as an undefeated juggernaut through having him wrestle and squash various wrestlers, including established wrestlers such as Ric Flair and Sabu. Other examples include The Great Khali and Mark Henry, who squash victims on a regular basis, and Batista who, prior to his face turn and Heavyweight Championship reign, regularly squashed much smaller wrestlers. Handicap matches are often booked as squashes, allowing a monster to show dominance over multiple wrestlers at once.
One example of a face using squash matches to devastating effect was WCW's Goldberg in his storyline against the nWo, where Goldberg would quickly defeat a heel opponent after using his spear and jackhammer finishers against him. In the NWA, Magnum T.A. was also well-known for his quick squashes ending with a belly-to-belly suplex.
Notable squash matches
While most squash matches involve established wrestlers defeating jobbers, sometimes the opponents are established wrestlers. Whatever the reason – either to establish him as unstoppable, to (shoot) deal with an uncooperative or underachieving wrestler or simply to further an angle – several matches have become well-known in the wrestling community:
One of the earliest well-known squash matches took place at the inaugural WrestleMania, when King Kong Bundy used an avalanche and big splash to crush S.D. Jones in an announced time of nine seconds.
Other examples include:
- The Honky Tonk Man vs. The Ultimate Warrior (at SummerSlam 1988) – The Warrior defeated The Honky Tonk Man in 31 seconds to capture the Intercontinental Championship, ending Honky Tonk Man's 454 day reign.
- Diesel vs. Bob Backlund (November 26, 1994 house show) — Backlund had won the WWF Championship only three days prior at the Survivor Series before his title match with Diesel at a house show at Madison Square Garden. Backlund lost after only a single offensive move, Diesel's Jackknife Powerbomb. The match lasted only eight seconds, and remains the record for the shortest WWF or WWE title match.
- The Ultimate Warrior vs. Hunter Hearst Helmsley (at WrestleMania XII) — The Warrior no sold Helmsley's pedigree and defeated him in less than two minutes.
- Test defeats William Regal for the WWE European Championship in less than three minutes. Regal didn't have a single offensive move in the match before being defeated with a diving elbow drop.
- John Cena defeated Carly Colón for the WWE United States Championship in a squash match. Carlito had antagonized Smackdown General Manager Theodore Long, who forced Carlito to compete while injured.
- Chris Benoit vs. Orlando Jordan (at SummerSlam 2005) — Benoit needed 25.5 seconds to deliver a series of German suplexes and a Crippler Crossface to force Jordan to submit and capture the United States Championship. He would later defeat Jordan in a series of rematches, each shorter than the last.
- Rob Van Dam vs. Santino Marella (at RAW 15th Anniversary episode) - Rob Van Dam returned to the WWE for one night only to answer an open challenge from Santino Marella and defeated him within a minute after a high roundhouse kick to the head and his signature Five-Star Frog Splash.
- Kane vs Chavo Guerrero (at Wrestlemania 24) - Kane won a 24-man battle royal before the show started to win a title shot to Chavo's ECW Championship. Kane appeared behind Chavo before the match started and chokeslammed him for the quickest title change (at 8 seconds) since the aforementioned title match between Benoit and Jordan. This was also the quickest Wrestlemania match, tied with aforementioned match between King Kong Bundy and S.D. Jones.
- While feuding with JBL, Rey Mysterio organised a United States Championship match between JBL and Bobby Lashley. Lashley delivered a spear to JBL to win the title.
- William Regal vs Hornswoggle (at 2008 King of the Ring) - Immediately after the match started, Regal attacked Hornswoggle with his elbow before forcing him to submit to the Regal Stretch and advance to the next round of the KOTR tournament, in match that lasted 19 seconds.