User:EEng
Museum of Unintentionally Hilarious Edit Outcomes
[2] First look at the diff, then see the last image on the right.
- (with thanks to Martinevans123: [3])
If only every day included something like this
From the Talk page for Prawn Cocktail, "a seafood dish consisting of shelled, cooked, prawns in a Marie Rose sauce"...
- The lead says the prawn cocktail "'has spent most of [its life] see-sawing from the height of fashion to the laughably passé' and is now often served with a degree of irony." It's my understanding that people with anemia will often add even more irony as a dietary supplement. I think that should be recognized in the article. EEng (talk) 05:26, 28 June 2014 (UTC)
Ready?
|
|---|
|
Other saucy humor
[4] (check out the edit summary).
A wise man once said...
Plus ça change, plus c'est la même chose ("Wait for coins to drop, then make your selection").
Words in bold are for the assistance of the humor-impaired.
Another wise man once said...
Every author, however modest, keeps a most outrageous vanity chained like a madman in the padded cell of his breast.
Logan Pearsall Smith (1931). Afterthoughts.
Proof that the ancient Romans foresaw the internet, Wikipedia, and the bane of WP autobios
Plutarch relates, that before this, upon some of Cato's friends expressing their surprise, that while many persons without merit or reputation had statues, he had none, he answered, "I had much rather it should be asked why the people have not erected a statue to Cato, than why they have."
— Encyclopaedia Britannica (1797)
A rolling stone gathers no MOS
- In the last 48 hr I've become aware of a simmering dispute over whether the text of MOS itself should be in American or British English. With any luck the participants will put that debate (let's call it Debate D1) on hold in order to begin Debate D2: consideration of the variety of English in which D1 should be conducted. Then, if there really is a God in Heaven, D1 and D2 will be the kernel around which will form an infinite regress of metadebates D3, D4, and so on -- a superdense accrection of pure abstraction eventually collapsing on itself to form a black hole of impenetrable disputation, wholly aloof from the mundane cares of practical application and from which no light, logic or reason can emerge.
- That some editors will find themselves inexorably and irreversibly drawn into this abyss, mesmerized on their unending trip to nowhere by a kaleidoscope of linguistic scintillation reminiscent of the closing shots of 2001, is of course to be regretted. But they will know in their hearts that their sacrifice is for greater good of Wikipedia. That won't be true, of course, but it would be cruel to disabuse them of that comforting fiction as we bid them farewell and send them on their way.[1]
Computer porn
|
The Barnstar of Good Humor | |
| This was entertaining. So, when will Bodice-Ripping Bots be out in theaters? Sophus Bie (talk) 10:42, 28 September 2013 (UTC) |
- When correctly viewed / Everything is lewd.
- I could tell you things about Peter Pan / And the Wizard of Oz—there's a dirty old man!
For those who are wondering we're talking about this literary gem, which came to me in some deliroius fog after I noticed User:BracketBot leaving a message on User:Citation bot's talkpage (though I need to say that the final, um, climax is cribbed from a vaguely remembered cartoon from the 90s). Bracketbot notifies editors who make changes apparently resulting in unbalanced parens, brackets, and similar markup in articles, and apparently Citationbot had done just that:
- [From the upcoming major motion picture Bodice-Ripping Bots.]
- Parental Advisory:
- UF – Undocumented Features
- ST – Strong Typing
- MSI – Master-Slave Interfaces
- BL – Binding and Linking
- EP – Explicit Parallelism
- OC / AL – some Open Coding and Assembly Language
- Parental Advisory:
- "Oh, hi, I'm Citationbot. Wow, thanks. I've been looking everywhere for that other bracket! So you're that big strong Bracketbot I've heard so much about. Gosh, you must be 64-bit – really big quads! – and completely hardcoded – such a complex instruction set! And look at those great ABS addresses! Why don't you come into my domain? That's not my usual protocol, but a girl feels secure when a guy has all that cache onboard. I wasn't expecting to host, so pardon my open proxy – a bit RISCé, perhaps, but just something I wear around the server farm. Do my transparent upper layers expose my virtual
mammarymemory? These dual cores are absolutely real – 100% native configuration – no upgrades at all! Should I slip into a more user-friendly interface – something GUI, perhaps? Or perhaps you prefer command-line? – kinky! ..." - Later: "Oh, Bracketbot! I've never been ported to a platform like this! Go ahead and expose my implementation and directly access my low-level interface – forget the wrapper function! I'm overloaded by your amazing data stream – and what a high refresh rate! My husband has a really short cycle time and his puny little floppy drive is subject to frequent hardware failures and won't reboot, so I have to manually terminate him! And I've never had 10 gigabytes of hard drive before! Let's FTP! ... Oh god! I'm downloading ..."
My special research interest
I am the second author of Reference #20, and first author mentioned in Note Z, of this version of the article on Phineas Gage.
A proposed addition to the ANI toolbox
References
Tomorrow's (at least it should be) Featured Article
The first Arab siege of Constantinople in 674–678 was a major conflict of the Arab–Byzantine wars, and the first culmination of the Umayyad Caliphate's expansionist strategy towards the Byzantine Empire. In 672–673 Arab fleets secured bases along the coasts of Asia Minor, and set up a loose blockade around Constantinople. They used the peninsula of Cyzicus near the city as a base to spend the winter, and returned every spring to launch attacks against the city's fortifications. Finally the Byzantines managed to destroy the Arab navy using a new invention, the liquid incendiary substance known as Greek fire (pictured). The Byzantines also defeated the Arab land army in Asia Minor, forcing them to lift the siege. A peace treaty was signed, and following the outbreak of another Muslim civil war, the Byzantines experienced a brief period of ascendancy. The siege was the first major Arab defeat in 50 years of expansion. Tales of a large-scale siege of Constantinople even reached China. (Full article...)
Handy stuff
 | No user-serviceable parts inside. |
- Googlebooks ref generator The best thing since sliced bread!