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GA Review

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Reviewer: ElectricController (talk · contribs) 00:30, 16 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]


This is my first GA review. I have read and followed the instructions, but I might still face some difficulties. That being said, this review only shows what I think, and I will try my best. – electricController 00:30, 16 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:

Lead

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  • "rage and love." - It should be "rage versus love", according to the reference 28.
Just saw the reference refers to the record, not to the character. So, I believe the whole sentence in the lead has to be rewritten.
  • "eventually sold 16 million copies" - {{timeframe}} When, exactly, the album sold 16 million copies?
Unfortunately, the source (which I think does pass WP:RS) does not have a specified timeframe of when it reached this milestone. It doesn't even have a post date. If it did, I'm sure it'd already be there. dannymusiceditor Speak up! 13:54, 16 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Background

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  • "Subsequent releases were also hits, including Insomniac (1995) and Nimrod (1997)." - Unsourced.
I think this can be inferred by the certifications on the albums. We could say smaller hits, because Dookie was about five times as successful (at least in the States). dannymusiceditor Speak up! 15:41, 30 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]
True. Would it be redundant to add sources for those sales? – electricController 16:39, 30 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]
How about I note that they're multi-platinum? That's a hit. dannymusiceditor Speak up! 16:48, 30 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Fine. – electricController 16:54, 30 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Their subsequent album Warning, released in 2000, was considered a significant commercial disappointment, despite largely positive reviews." - Source only mentions the reviews, but does not support the "commercial disappointment". So, it needs an additional source, in my opinion.
  • "Armstrong", "Cool" and "Dirnt" were not previously introduced to the reader. I think using their full names (Billie Joe Armstrong, Tré Cool and Mike Dirnt) might be helpful. Also, please link their names (they all have articles).

Recording and production

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  • "American Idiot was born out of two incidents: the loss of the aforementioned recordings and an occasion when the trio each individually crafted their own grandiose thirty-second songs." - grandiose looks like puffery. Also, unsourced.
The entirety of this is covered within the Entertainment Weekly reference. Also, does "ambitious" work instead of "grandiose"? It's the best I could think of. dannymusiceditor Speak up! 14:44, 16 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]
  • "ProTools" - Use Pro Tools instead.
  • "The room was made famous by singers Frank Sinatra and Elvis Presley." - Is this relevant to the album? How did this impact the album's release?
  • "likening it to a mountain" - How?

Composition

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  • "exit their comfort zone" - idiomatic expressions should be avoided.
  • "his signature bass" - Which bass?
I believe this is a mistake. His signature bass was a Fender Precision.
  • "American Idiot is a concept album that describes the story of a central character named Jesus of Suburbia, an anti-hero created by Billie Joe Armstrong." - If reference 38 covers this, please add it to the end of the sentence.

Artwork

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  • "After finishing the music for the album, the band decided that the artwork needed to reflect the themes on the record, likening the change of image to a political campaign. Armstrong recalled, "We wanted to be firing on all cylinders. Everything from the aesthetic to the music to the look. Just everything." Green Day drew inspiration from Chinese communist propaganda art the band saw in art galleries on Melrose Avenue and recruited artist Chris Bilheimer, who had designed the art for the previous records Nimrod and International Superhits! to create the cover." - All sentences are unsourced.
  • "After listening to the new music on his computer, Bilheimer took note of the lyric "And she's holding on my heart like a hand grenade" from "She's a Rebel". Influenced by artist Saul Bass's poster for the 1955 drama film The Man with the Golden Arm, and EXODUS, Bilheimer created an upstretched arm holding a red heart-shaped grenade." - Sentences are unsourced.
These are all sourced by the ref that comes soonest after them. Would you like me to repeat the notes somewhere in between? dannymusiceditor Speak up! 15:58, 30 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]
I think it would be better. – electricController 16:36, 30 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Critical reception

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Accolades

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  • "The album helped Green Day win seven of the eight awards it was nominated for at the 2005 MTV Video Music Awards" - Unclear meaning.
  • Japan Gold Disc Awards, Juno Awards and MTV Europe Music Awards are unsourced.

Grammy Awards

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Largely unsourced section; although there are previous references in "In 2005, American Idiot won a Grammy Award for Best Rock Album and was nominated in six other categories including Album of the Year [...] A year later, "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" won a Grammy Award for Record of the Year", I think these sources (refs 65 to 67) should be repeated in this section. Also, these references do not cover Best Rock Performance by a Duo or Group with Vocals, Best Rock Song and Best Music Video Short Form.

Commercial performance

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  • "Worldwide, its sales are estimated at 16 million" - I believe it should be added "as of 2013" to the sentence, because that is the date of the reference. Also, is diffuser.fm a reliable source?

Touring

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  • "Armstrong often baited the crowd" - Maybe a POV sentence. If this exact word ("baited") is mentioned by the source, please put quotation marks around it.

Adaptations

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  • "Spoonerism" - "spoonerism" (lowercase)
  • "This became a cause célèbre when a cease and desist order was served by Green Day's record label." - Please add reference 107 to the end of this sentence.

Film

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  • "Michael Mayer, director of the Broadway musical, will be the director of the film. The film will be produced by Green Day, Pat Magnarella (Green Day's manager and producer of Bullet in a Bible and Awesome as Fuck), Playtone and Tom Hulce." - Unsourced.

Track listing

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  • "In 2015, Kerrang! Magazine [...]" and "Kerrang! Covers American Idiot" - Italicize "Kerrang!" as Kerrang!.

Personnel

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Unsourced.

Heart Like a Hand Grenade

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  • "On July 15, 2014, director John Roecker [...] According to this Facebook post, the movie is due in September 2015." - These two paragraphs are only covered by primary (and potentially unreliable) sources.
  • "On September 14, 2015, it was announced via Green Day's website that the film would receive a theatrical release on October 15, 2015." - Maybe it needs to be updated?
  • Late thought: wouldn't it be better if this section were moved to before the "Track listing" section? It is messing with the format of the references.
Perhaps. I don't know, really. This would be the first article where I've had to deal with this kind of thing. I'll do it. dannymusiceditor Speak up! 16:46, 30 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Would you rather it mess up the tracklist or the reflist? dannymusiceditor Speak up! 23:16, 30 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Notes

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References

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  • Reference "Spitz, 2006" is not linked to bibliography.
What do you mean? Marc Spitz is listed in the bibliography. dannymusiceditor Speak up! 01:13, 26 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]
It is, but I think it would be better to use {{sfn}}, for example. – electricController 19:33, 28 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Done, but it caused cite errors I don't know how to fix. dannymusiceditor Speak up! 15:46, 30 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]
Fixed. – electricController 16:36, 30 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]
  • Reference 120 is a dead link. Maybe "Fix dead links" tool is helpful.
  • Please fix reference 147 (it shows "{{{album}}}" in the title). (Edit: Now it is reference 148.)

The article will be on hold.

All issues were fixed, so I will pass the article.