Talk:Charles Dinsmoor/GA1
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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 21:40, 12 March 2021 (UTC)
- The Rambling Man Thanks for taking.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 17:48, 15 March 2021 (UTC)
Comments
- Infobox header says "Frederick dinsmoor".
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:14, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "a nineteenth-century American" no need for century (that's a given based on his birth/death) and no need to link American.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:14, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "to the bar" link.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:14, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- Could put some geographical context in the lead.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:50, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "Ireland but are from" were?
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:50, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "1834.[1] Dinsmoor's family genealogy.." His family...
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:50, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- I think his "ancestors" sentence belongs with these sentences.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:50, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "arrive in America, John Dinsmoor. John came to America" repetitive.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:50, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "from Londonderry, Ireland and" comma after Ireland.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:50, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "governor of New Hampshire"" link?
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:50, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "Congress" link?
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:50, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- " Samuel Dinsmoor, Jr." these no longer use commas.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:50, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "New England" link.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:50, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- Elk Township, Warren County, Pennsylvania has an article.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:50, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "became a student" where? How?
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:39, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "... business for about eleven years in the same cities. The printing he did while teaching and attending school" merge.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:39, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "During the last three of this time he" years? And "of this time" is awkward phrasing.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:39, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "and was in that" -> "and held that"
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 12:53, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "he was twenty-two years old." do you mean he started a year-long course when he was 22?
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 13:26, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "admitted to the bar of " link.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 13:26, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "assistant United States marshal" what does this mean? Is there a link?
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 13:35, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "1860 census" link?
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 13:35, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "Dinsmoor has been" Dinsmoor was?
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 13:35, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- Link Oddfellows.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 13:35, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "his health failed. The last five years of his life he had failing health " bit repetitive again, suggest a reword to merge to avoid the repeat.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:18, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- " (b. 10/17/1867)" write out in prose.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:18, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- Link "patent No".
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:18, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- " of Stockton, California in" comma after Cali.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:18, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "after the subject of this article" not how we write things.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:18, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- Ref 9, en-dash in the year range in the title.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:18, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- "1886" is not a helpful caption.
- Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:18, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
That's all I have so it's on hold for now. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!) 21:39, 15 March 2021 (UTC)
- Thanks for review. I'll start on the issues tomorrow.--Doug Coldwell (talk)
- @The Rambling Man: All issues have been addressed. Can you take another look. Thanks.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:18, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
- Ok, I made a few tweaks. Passing. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!) 08:22, 17 March 2021 (UTC)
- @The Rambling Man: All issues have been addressed. Can you take another look. Thanks.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:18, 16 March 2021 (UTC)