Talk:Charles E. Apgar/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Hog Farm (talk · contribs) 16:03, 14 February 2020 (UTC)

Criteria

1. Well-written

Prose clear/concise/understandable Y

Spelling/Grammar Y

MOS lead Y

MOS layout Y Not standard for a biography, but I can see your logic.

2. Verifiable

No OR Y - One CN is all

No COPYVIO Y

List of references properly formatted Y

Inline citations from reliable sources Y

3. Broad in coverage

Covers main aspects Y

Stays on topic Y

4. Neutral Y

5. Stable Y

6. Illustrated if possible

Media tagged for copyright status Y

Media relevant Y

Comments

Infobox I'd recommend moving the citations for his dates of birth/death into the text and out of the infobox. People looking for verification look for the citations in the text, not the infobox.

 Done --mikeu ^talk 00:09, 17 February 2020 (UTC)

Biography Could we mention his date of birth in the biography, especially since we mention his date of death? Also, the usual formula for a biography is "early life-career-retirement/death-legacy", but this one has the entire biography first, then the main career. Not a big deal, but this layout isn't particularly common in biographies.

 Done (first part) I did struggle with how to arrange the layout. He didn't earn income from his amateur radio work beyond the compensation for the recordings which only lasted a few weeks. So I didn't include his radio hobby as part of his career employment. His biography is not well documented beyond the Sayville story. --mikeu ^talk 00:09, 17 February 2020 (UTC)

Amateur radio "(see Wireless recordings)" - Is this parenthetical reference to the very next section necessary? If so, probably better as a note than inserting directly into the text.

 Done No, I don't think this is needed. Removed. --mikeu ^talk 01:06, 15 February 2020 (UTC)

"which by this time was using the callsign WHB" - The applicable part of the source states: "I heard O. H. X (now W. H. B.) Seagate and one other station." This does not appear to address the statement made in the article. The statement in the article is for an event in 1913 (first recording), while this is about Apgar's first transmission heard, in 1910. Citation that directly addresses this needed.

The last paragraph at the end of page 337 and continuing on 338 states the 1913 date of his first recording which is the New York Herald station. There are two sections that mention the Herald. I could include this Herald story (orginal behind a paywall, reprint at https://earlyradiohistory.us/1917WHB.htm) which describes the station changing call sign. I also corrected a typo OHN to the correct OHX. I removed the quote from the citation as the scan of the documents is available online. The quote might be confusing as that source is cited multiple times. --mikeu ^talk 00:09, 17 February 2020 (UTC)

Encoded messages You use the example of "Frederick Chappel" signify the name of a submarine, but the source has "Chappell". Is this variation an accident or intentional?

 Done That was a typo. Fixed. --mikeu ^talk 00:09, 17 February 2020 (UTC)

Do we have to have all of these notices to "see photo"?

 Done Removed. --mikeu ^talk 00:09, 17 February 2020 (UTC)

"It was captioned "The Radio Detective Who Unfathomed the Famous 'Nauen Buzz'" and the description read:" I'd recommend moving the citation to after the block quote, to make it clear that the quote is cited.

 Done --mikeu ^talk 03:43, 16 February 2020 (UTC)

Images - Do we really need two images of the Sayville tower? I think the actual picture is the more applicable one as opposed to the magazine cover.

I think so. There was quite a bit of anti-German sentiment during this era and I think that the extra image portrays this well. It shows an aspect of the controversy about the interpretation that goes beyond the text. I'm not very invested in this but I do think it adds to the page. --mikeu ^talk 03:43, 16 February 2020 (UTC)

The references appear to be good, that's all I'm concerned about. Hog Farm (talk) 22:28, 14 February 2020 (UTC)

Everything looks good to me now, I'll pass it is a GA. Hog Farm (talk) 02:15, 17 February 2020 (UTC)