Talk:Dolichovespula saxonica

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This page was added by May Xac, for a class assignment in the Behavioral Ecology class at Washington University in St. Louis. If you have any suggestions for me, please let me know. Thanks! Mayxac (talk) 18:22, 15 October 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Peivaz Edits[edit]

In general, this was a very well-written article. The organization made sense and I felt that there were a wide variety of topics touched upon. Furthermore, there was an impressive amount of linking to other Wikipedia articles. Lastly, your information was reliable and consistent with my research. Since my wasp is a parasitic wasp, I was easily able to cross check your information with mine and everything was consistent across both articles. The only things I changed were typos and some awkward wording. Other than that the article flowed extremely well.Peivaz

Zroscope Edits[edit]

Bolded your first mention of the species in the Overview. Wikilinked some non-hyperlinked words.
Under header "Taxonomy and phylogenetics" changed "This differs from the Vespula genus, which often make" to "This differs from the Vespula genus, whose members often make".
"D. saxonica is similar to its relatives with the black and yellow stripes on its body." What relatives? It's immediate family/colony or similar species, or same species?
Made some grammatical edits.
Under "Distribution and habitat" changed "Some of the countries where the species is abundantly found" to "Areas where the species can be commonly found include".
"Within these areas, D. saxonica can be found hanging freely" hanging like chilling out or are the nests doing the hanging? Would "roaming freely" fit better?
Under "Thermal Regulation" I changed "However, the months of May through August in Europe and Asia illustrate temperatures that often deviate from this stable temperature" to "However, the months of May through August in Europe and Asia illustrate weather that often deviates the nest away from this stable temperature".
"However" and "typically" are repeated a lot in many of these articles. No more excessive repetition...
Changed "The majority of cases, which are aerial nests,..." to "In the majority of cases, where aerial nests are involved, there must be many more envelopes surrounding the nest, since they are exposed to natural elements such as strong winds and rain".
"For D. saxonica, the alarm behavior is believed to ensue in response to sprayed venom or when a wasp stings." Is saxon the one stinging and releasing venom? Not too clear. Could say "alarm behavior ensues after venom is sprayed", not in response since it sounds like an opponent is spraying the venom and the wasp is responding to that.
"This type of alarm is seen in other vespines..." I question the usage of "vespines" here...Looks like it should be capitalized but it's not supposed to be...oh well.
"to increase aggressive and flighting behaviors" flighting or fighting?
Under "Parasites within the genus", "It is a parasite of Dolichovespula arenaria and Dolichovespula alpicola in the Nearctic region, which covers North America, Greenland, and the highlands of Mexico." Is this relevant to your species?
(I can't believe wasp waste is even noticeable enough to get people sick. Wow.)
"Saxon wasps can also decrease populations of bothersome insects, such as flies, since the larvae are fed on them" This is a bit opinionated.
Your references are great. Zroscope (talk) 02:26, 24 October 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Some suggestions[edit]

Hi May! These are possible areas of improvement: The second paragraph in “Description and identification” is lacking any links to other articles. You could probably make links for “aerial nester,” “ball-shaped,” “combs,” “fibers,” “ventilation holes,” and “waste.” You could also go further and describe the physical characteristics of workers, pupae, larvae, and eggs. If you can find the information on this you can also go into a description of their anatomy, hydrocarbons, and life stages (egg, larva, pupa, adult). For “Distribution and habitat,” you can add a map of the distribution for this species and/or compare the distribution with the distribution of other local or regional wasps nearby. You can add more to “Taxonomy and phylogenetics” by discussing the implications of each taxonomic classification for your species. For example, what are some characteristics that all Dolichovespula species have in common? And/or you can discuss the history of how this species was named. Who named it, and when? Were there any changes made to its name or classification over time? “Colonies in cities” is entirely lacking in links to other articles. You could try to make links for “urban areas,” “wooded hills,” “human intervention,” “rafters,” “physically stable,” “climate conditions,” “humidity,” and “microorganisms.” In general, the presence of links is very sparse throughout your article, with only one or two links per section. There are many opportunities to add more links to other articles, especially for interesting vocabulary words, concepts, and proper nouns. Overall, cool article! It was interesting to read! Compliments on your thoroughness and beautiful organization! :) Carzhong (talk) 04:05, 24 October 2014 (UTC)[reply]