Talk:Hollywood Game Night/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: AmericanAir88 (talk · contribs) 21:12, 22 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Good day, I will be handling the review for this article. I hope we can get through this easy and stress free. Happy Thanksgiving! AmericanAir88 (talk) 21:12, 22 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Opening Comments

Welcome to the review for Hollywood Game Night. I structure my reviews like a trial. My reviews are all about your voice as I will simply post issues and you will do the work solving them. If necessary I will make very minor copy edits to the article if I feel they don't need a whole bullet point dedicated to them. Anyway, I am looking forward to working with you. AmericanAir88 (talk) 21:12, 22 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Issues

The lead paragraph could use some expansion and reworking especially this section "The series has generally received positive critical reception and earned relatively modest television ratings, while also inspiring several worldwide adaptions, as well as a party game and mobile app based on the show. The series' fifth season premiered on June 22, 2017."

Done. --Bcschneider53 (talk) 00:24, 24 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Excellent work AmericanAir88 (talk) 16:17, 25 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

You mention several times that the celebrities donate to a charity. If you can, is it possible to find the charities they are donating to?

It varies based on which celebrity is playing; since it's almost always a different one, list every single charity would be superfluous and virtually impossible to cite. --Bcschneider53 (talk) 00:24, 24 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Understandable AmericanAir88 (talk) 16:17, 25 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

" The non-celebrity player is designated captain of the team." Confused me, Expand more.

Reworded (there are two contestants who are the captains of each team; three celebrities accompany each contestant on said teams. --Bcschneider53 (talk) 00:24, 24 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Update the number of episodes and the "as of date"

It already is up to date; don't worry, if/when new episodes come back, I'll be on it :) --Bcschneider53 (talk) 00:24, 24 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

The entire "Games" section feels run on, as each sentence starts with "Other games include" or something similar.

Done? Let me know how it reads now. --Bcschneider53 (talk) 00:24, 24 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

"On August 1, 2011, NBC announced that they were developing the series, then under the name Celebrity Game Night.[6] The project's name was changed to Hollywood Game Night when it was ordered to series on December 18, 2012." Very confusing. Wrong words in some places.

Fixed. --Bcschneider53 (talk) 00:24, 24 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Update the Production section for recent times. It seems the fifth season has started.

Done. --Bcschneider53 (talk) 00:24, 24 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

If possible, expand the Merchandise section.

Not really possible as the only merchandise available to my knowledge is the app and the board game; I'll look into that though... --Bcschneider53 (talk) 00:24, 24 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

AmericanAir88 (talk) 14:40, 23 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

@AmericanAir88: Thank you for this. Will be spending most of the day with family but will look at these when I can. Happy Thanksgiving, –Bcschneider53 (talk) 16:19, 23 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

@AmericanAir88:

Done everything, let me know how things look on your second pass through. --Bcschneider53 (talk) 00:24, 24 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

@Bcschneider53: I apologize for the delay, everything looks fantastic, the review chart will now begin its final stages. AmericanAir88 (talk) 16:18, 25 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Review Chart

Rate	Attribute	Review Comment
1. Well-written:
	1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct.	Very Concise and Clear
	1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation.	Compiles
2. Verifiable with no original research:
	2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline.	Everything is sourced
	2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose).	All sources are reliable
	2c. it contains no original research.	No original research, everything is sourced
	2d. it contains no copyright violations or plagiarism.	No violations
3. Broad in its coverage:
	3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic.	All main aspects addressed
	3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style).	Stays on task
	4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each.	Very Neutral
	5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute.	No Edit Wars
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
	6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content.	All images are tagged and are valid
	6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions.	Images are relevant
	7. Overall assessment.	Congratulations you passed

Closing Comments

Congratulations on passing. Your dedication and hard work was fantastic. I hope we can work together in the near future. Have a fantastic rest of the weekend. If you want, Ill even review your other nomination of "1v100". Thank you. AmericanAir88 (talk) 16:29, 25 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

@AmericanAir88: Thank you! No sweat if you're busy (it is that time of year again), but I would greatly appreciate a review of 1 vs. 100 if you are up to it. Also, let me know if I can do anything for you! --Bcschneider53 (talk) 16:35, 25 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]

@Bcschneider53: Of course I will review it. Anything for you. AmericanAir88 (talk) 16:38, 25 November 2017 (UTC)[reply]