Talk:Hurricane Hilary (1993)/GA1
Appearance
GA Review
[edit]GA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Reviewer: The Bushranger (talk · contribs) 01:29, 29 December 2011 (UTC)
The following issues in the text need to be addressed before this can be passed for GA:
- Lede
- "Hurricane Hillary was a Category 3 hurricane..." Might want to clarify "East Pacific"/"Pacific Ocean" or something, as the reader could presume it was an Atlantic hurricane otherwise.
- Meh, added. YE Pacific Hurricane 16:37, 29 December 2011 (UTC)
- "Nearly stalled as it underwent a Fujiwhara interaction..." Would suggest just "as it interacted with" and move the Fujiwhara comment and link to "Meteorological History", to tighten and simplify the lede a bit. The fact it intereacted is sufficent for the lede, I think; how it interacted can be explained in more detail later.
- The line about watches and warnings is slightly confusing. The threat ended? Then started again? Suggest similifying this a bit.
- Yea, it ended, but started again, but explained that further via a wikilink to. YE Pacific Hurricane 16:37, 29 December 2011 (UTC)
- Meteorological History
- Should wikilink convection and tropical wave.
- "the depression intensified into..." suggest "the depression intensified, becoming..."
- Incorporated. YE Pacific Hurricane 16:37, 29 December 2011 (UTC)
- "atmospheric circulation..." does this mean Low-level Circulation Center? I'd assume the circulation would be fairly easy to find, but pinning down the center might be difficult.
- Yea, change the wording. YE Pacific Hurricane 16:37, 29 December 2011 (UTC)
- "meteorolgists remarked the possibility of making landfall..." Bit of a grammar issue here. Perhaps "meterologists suggested there was a possibility the storm might make landfall..."
- "downgraded into a tropical storm..." suggeest "downgraded to a tropical storm..."
- "while most of the mid to upper level moisture..." suggest adding "associated with the storm" immediately after this.
- Preparations and Impact
- "further advisories were issued..." What sort of advisories?
- Watches and warnings.
- "Heavy rains, peaking at..." suggest "Heavy rains, with a maximum recorded amount of..."
- "Baja California Peninsula", shouldn't that be a lowercase P?
- No, it is a proper known (a type of peninsula). YE Pacific Hurricane 16:37, 29 December 2011 (UTC)
- Pictures are all appropriately licensed;
- References are from reliable sources and are inline appropriately, meets WP:V, WP:RS, WP:NOR;
- Appears to be free of copyvio/paraphasing/plagarism concerns
- Covers the topic well without going off on tangents;
- Is neutral and stable;
- MOS adhered to.
I'm putting this On hold until the grammar/text issues above are resolved. - The Bushranger One ping only 01:29, 29 December 2011 (UTC)
- Nice work. I'm calling this a ✓ Pass. - The Bushranger One ping only 00:46, 30 December 2011 (UTC)