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GA Review

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Reviewer: Mujinga (talk · contribs) 14:56, 5 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]


Overview

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Hi No Swan So Fine, I'll take this on as part the Wikipedia:WikiProject Good articles/GAN Backlog Drives/January 2022. Mujinga (talk) 14:56, 5 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

  • So I've made some comments below, the article can be a good article but I'm not gonna lie, the prose needs a bit of work. I'll put the article on hold for a week, happy to answer any queries or extend the time needed by mutual agreement. Mujinga (talk) 15:57, 5 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
    • Thank you so much for such a thorough review - I've made the changes you suggested. The prose is certainly the better for it and the paragraphs are tighter. Great work. No Swan So Fine (talk) 00:34, 8 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
      • Hiya nice one the article def reads better now, but would you mind marking what you have and haven't done, because there's several things (eg Stasha/Sasha, Christina,/Cristina, the signature colours question) which haven't been answered
      • Also, on the lead the whole name can be in bold and for "Green was described as the "for tax reasons the legal owner" of her and her husband's estimated wealth of £4.9 billion by The Times in 2005.[1] In 2020 the couple's wealth was estimated at £930 million by the Sunday Times Rich List and at $2.4 billion by The World's Billionaires list published by Forbes in 2021.[2][3]" the info and references can be inserted in the text below. Mujinga (talk) 18:38, 8 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
    • Thanks again - I've moved that section and fixed the colours and name typos. No Swan So Fine (talk) 13:08, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
        • Great! All done then, except I took the liberty to re-add the info to the lead because I meant to say keep it there but move the text and refs down, sorry for the confusion, hope that works for you. And with that done, this is now a good article. Congrats, Mujinga (talk) 18:12, 10 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()
3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Copyvio check

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  • Nothing to worry about on earwig

Pictures

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  • no pic of her, shame
  • pictures suitable and licenses ok

Infobox

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  • seems ok, except for question over Cristina below

Lead

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  • "Christina Stuart "Tina" Green, Lady Green (née Paine, formerly Palos; born August 1949)" oh gosh what a name! i immediately wonder if the Lady Green is in the right place (MOS:LADY doesn't advise) and if "Tina" should follow Christina
  • will return to lead last

Early life and career

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Taveta and the Arcadia Group

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  • Again reading a bit disjointed
  • "In 2005 Tina Green was the recipient of a £1.2 billion dividend from Arcadia.[9] The dividend was the largest in British corporate history" suggest running those two sentences together
  • "The British Home Stores (BHS) group was acquired by Taveta for £200 million in 2000, it was subsequently sold in 2015 for £1, and went into administration in 2016." suggest The British Home Stores (BHS) group was acquired by Taveta for £200 million in 2000. It was subsequently sold in 2015 for £1, and went into administration in 2016."
  • "As the largest shareholder of the Arcadia Group, in 2019 Green agreed to put £100 million over three years into the group's two pension schemes in a deal agreed with the Pensions Regulator." - two agreeds in this sentence plus one in the one before, can you rephrase?
  • "The group had struggled with several years of declining sales and the economic fallout of the COVID-19 pandemic in the United Kingdom and had been perceived as having been suffering from underinvestment in comparison to other clothing stores." does not read well, can you rephrase, maybe it helps to break into two sentences?

UK Uncut protests

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  • ok

Green & Mingarelli

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Relationship with Richard Caring

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  • Maybe the title would better be Link to Richard Caring as my first thought was a romantic relationship
  • "Silver Angel was decorated by Green's company, Green & Mingarelli in their distinctive tones of white, cream and black" does not jibe well with the previous section's "Green's interior design work is noted for its distinctive use of monochromatic black and white"
    •  Fixed changed to her extensive use of black and white to set up Silver Angel anecdote. No Swan So Fine (talk) 13:08, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]

References

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