Wikipedia:Peer review/Templon/archive1

Templon[edit]

I wrote this article (adapated from a paper I wrote about a year back) on this important element in early Christian and Greek Orthodox archiecture and then left it. Subsequent editing has made it a bit muddled, I think, though it still has a lot of good information. Any suggestions on how to clean it up? It's very well-referenced, but also a bit dry and muddled, especially in the intro. Thanks! The PNM 09:57, 2 May 2005 (UTC)[reply]

Hi, here are a few ideas for you to work on. Ideally the introduction would be a summary of the article, what is it, when were they around, who built them etc, no need for explicit architectural details that follow in the text. The sections headings are good, but the text could use a general copy edit, thing like The origins of the templon are curious, should be written in a more encyclopedic style. Also you could add a list of famous templons at the end of the article. I'm surprised there isn't a picture, even a line drawing would do.--nixie 22:53, 2 May 2005 (UTC)[reply]
You have many references for the current article size, which is great, but it's not easy to see which reference to use to verify each section. Using a system of inline references (for example footnotes) would really help with this. Mozzerati 20:17, 2005 May 9 (UTC)