Wikipedia:Peer review/University of Michigan/archive1

University of Michigan[edit]

I have been working on this article for a while, and would like suggestions for further improvements (with the goal of getting this article featured). Pentawing 01:01, 14 September 2005 (UTC)[reply]

Good work on this, it is getting pretty close to FA status. One problem is that there are a whole bunch of uncited statistics, especially in the first paragraph of the Academics section, and in the Libraries and museums section. The images also have some problems. Image:UMichAngellHall.JPG, Image:UMichArtMuseum.JPG, and Image:MichiganDiagFall2004.jpg are all much too dark, and it is hard to make out any detail. These could be artificially brightened, but ideally they should be replaced by pictures taken when the structures are not in the shade. Image:Michiganstadiumgame.jpg is claimed as fairuse, but gives no justification. I personally doubt this image can validly be used under fairuse. The stack of templates at the bottom is also unsightly. This is a project wide issue, but having three templates with wholly different formatting is quite ugly. Consider creating a specialized template that merges the three together, such as how {{UK ties2}} recently replaced the plethora of boxes at United Kingdom. Alternatively you could alter the three to one standard design, which could also help several other pages. - SimonP 05:07, 15 September 2005 (UTC)[reply]
- I am going to take some pictures around campus in the next few days, as well as finding sources to back up (or modify) the statistics. Pentawing 22:37, 15 September 2005 (UTC)[reply]
The prose needs a thorough copy edit before nomination as a FAC. To pluck out a few examples from the first three sentences:
- Remove 'located'.
- 'primary' could be replaced by a better word.
- The distinction between 'research' and 'public academic' institution is unclear; why 'leading' and 'top' in the same sentence—reword so you don't need two very similar epithets; same with 'world's' and 'worldwide'.
- Merge the first two paragraphs.
- Remove the repetitive 'school' within the parentheses.
- 'consistently vs 'perennially'—this is the same problem; you aim for slight variety where that need points to poor wording in the first place.
- 'some of' --> 'among'.
- What is considered to be a 'Public Ivy', and what is that, anyway?
- Avoid 'also' unless absolutely necessary.

Also, consider citing hectares as an equivalent for acres (certainly not thousands of square metres). Please consider finding a collaborator who might sift through the whole article thus. Tony 13:39, 17 September 2005 (UTC)[reply]