Come Play Wiz Me

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"Come Play Wiz Me"
Desperate Housewives episode
Episode no. Season 3
Episode 13
Directed by Larry Shaw
Written by Valerie Ahern & Christian McLaughlin
Production code 313
Original air date January 21, 2007
Guest actors
Episode chronology
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"Not While I'm Around"
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"I Remember That"
List of Desperate Housewives episodes

"Come Play Wiz Me" is the 60th episode of the ABC television series, Desperate Housewives. It was also the thirteenth episode of the show's third season. The episode was written by Valerie Ahern and Christian McLaughlin and directed by Larry Shaw. It aired on January 21, 2007. Valerie Mahaffey chose this episode for consideration in the category of "Outstanding Guest Actress in a Comedy Series" at the 2007 Emmy Awards.[1]


Mike meets his new lawyer, Alan Marcus, who suggests he pleads to to manslaughter, which displeases Susan. Jane's (Ian's wife) condition takes a turn for the worse. Ian goes on a business trip to Montreal. He calls Susan from Montreal and tells her he got a call from the doctor about Jane's condition. He is coming home early, as he fears Jane is dying. He asks Susan to go to the hospital, as he doesn't want Jane to be alone if she dies. Susan meets Erika Gold, Jane's best friend, while she is kicking a man out of the hospital room. Erika tells Susan that his name is Ted, and Jane had an affair with him 5 years ago, causing marital problems between her and Ian. Jane's blood pressure drops and she is expected to die. Ian calls Susan from the plane, and Susan tells him she doesn't think Jane will be alive when he comes back. Susan puts the phone up to Jane's ear, and Ian says goodbye. At the end of the episode, Jane's corpse is seen being wheeled out of her room to the morgue.

After an 8-week leave of absence due to her gunshot wound, Lynette is finally returning to work. As she is ready to leave, Tom tells her that his manager, Ken, quit and he needs someone to accompany him to a street fair. Tom talks Lynette into helping him, and Lynette avoids work by putting her cast back on and pretending to be miserable when her boss, Ed, and his assistant, Jerry,arrive to pick her up. When Ed touches her in the shoulder, she screams in pretend pain, and lets her painkiller pills onto the ground. Ed and Jerry decide to leave her home for another week. Lynette goes with Tom to the street fair, where their pizza proves to be popular. All the kids are there except Kayla, who Mrs. McCluskey is babysitting. Ed returns to drop by a gift basket for Lynette. Mrs. McCluskey goes along with the lie and tells him she's at a doctor appointment, but Kayla, continuing to hate Lynette, tells him the truth. Ed goes to the street fair and fires Lynette, but Lynette begs and pleads and Ed decides to give her another chance. Lynette eventually changes her mind and quits her job to help Tom run the pizzeria.

The Snowflake Beauty Pageant takes place, and Sheri Maltby, one of Gabrielle and Vern's students, wins. However, Gabrielle sees Zach, who tells her that he bribed the judges. He begs Gabrielle to go out on a date with him, but she refuses. He continues to try to bribe her with gifts. When Susan learns that Zach is rich, she begs Gabrielle to get Zach to pay for Mike's bail. Gabrielle visits his home and Zach agrees in exchange for a date and a goodnight kiss. Gabrielle has fun on their date, but the kiss doesn't go so well. Gabrielle learns that Zach has paid other women to kiss him, and he also paid a band to hang out with him. Later, Gabrielle visits him, and promises him a platonc friendship.

Bree confronts Orson about the teeth she found in Alma's closet. Orson calls Gloria and tells her he knows about what she's planning with Alma, and he wants her to stop. Gloria comes to Bree's house and tells her that she thinks Orson and Alma belong together, and she's standing in the way of them. Bree ignores her and sprays water on her feet. Orson goes to Alma's house to confront her, and finds Alma lying in her bedroom, almost dead. Gloria is watching over Alma, who committed suicide due to depression about Orson not loving her. Gloria offers Orson a drink, but the drink is full of drugs, which knocks him out. Alma reveals she faked her suicide and pushes Orson onto her bed. Gloria leaves to give them some privacy. Alma put two drugs in the drink: sleeping pills, and Viagra. Alma tells Orson before he falls asleep that she has been injecting herself with hormones to help her get pregnant with his baby. She rapes him. Bree comes home from her book club, and Andrew tells her that Orson is at Alma's house. Bree sees only a bedroom light on in Alma's house. She finds Orson and Alma in bed, and discovers the drugs she gave him. Bree punches Alma in the face, calls Andrew, and tells him to bring a wheelbarrow.

Mike confronts Paul about paying his attacker. Paul tells him the truth about their history and that Zach is Mike's biological son. He asks Mike to convince Zach to visit him in prison. After Zach posts his bail, Mike comes home and finds him on his doorstep. He thanks Zach, and Zach tells him to let him know if he needs anything else. Zach visits Paul, and Paul says he never stopped loving him. Paul then asks him a favor; to give him money so he can hire someone to track down Felicia. Zach refuses and walks away, as he plans to marry Gabrielle and spend all his money on her.


This episode attracted 17.08 million viewers in its original US airing.


Although credited, Julie Mayer (Andrea Bowen), Danielle Van De Kamp (Joy Lauren), Austin McCann (Josh Henderson), Preston Scavo (Brent Kinsman), and Porter Scavo (Shane Kinsman), do not appear in this episode. Edie Britt (Nicollette Sheridan) and Carlos Solis (Ricardo Antonio Chavira) have no speaking lines.

Title reference[edit]

The episode title, Come Play Wiz Me refers to a song from the Stephen Sondheim musical, Anyone Can Whistle.

International titles[edit]

  • French: En une fraction de secondes (In a split second)
  • French (Canada): La vie peut changer (Life Can Change)
  • German: Hinterlistig (Perfidious)
  • Hebrew: בוא לשחק איתי (Bo Lesachek Iti; Come Play with Me)
  • Hungarian: Hátsó szándékok (Hidden Agendas)
  • Italian: Vieni a giocare con me (Come Play With Me)
  • Spanish: Ven a Jugar Conmigo (Come Play With Me)


  1. ^ "2007 Emmys CONFIRMED Episode Submissions". The Envelope Forum, Los Angeles Times. Retrieved 2007-06-18.