Rumpology
Rumpology or bottom reading is a pseudoscience akin to physiognomy, performed by examining crevices, dimples, warts, moles and folds of a person's buttocks in much the same way a chirologist would read the palm of the hand.[2]
History
The term rumpology is a neologism. The late American astrologer Jackie Stallone claimed that rumpology is known to have been practiced in ancient times by the Babylonians, the Indians, and the Ancient Greeks and Romans.[3]
Theory and practice
Rumpologists have a variety of theories as to the meaning of different posterior characteristics. According to Stallone, the left and right buttocks reveal a person's past and future, respectively, although she has also commented that "The crack of your behind corresponds to the division of the two hemispheres of the brain".[4] According to blind German clairvoyant and rumpologist Ulf Buck, an "apple-shaped, muscular bottom indicates someone who is charismatic, dynamic, very confident and often creative. A person who enjoys life. A pear-shaped bottom suggests someone very steadfast, patient and down-to-earth."[5] The British rumpologist Sam Amos claims that "A round bottom indicates the person is open, happy and optimistic in life. However, a flat bottom suggests the person is rather vain and is negative and sad."[6]
Rumpology can be performed either by sight, touch or by using buttock prints.[3] In addition to live readings, Jackie Stallone performed buttock readings using e-mailed digital photographs,[7] and has claimed to predict the outcome of Presidential elections and Oscar awards by reading the bottoms of her two pet Doberman Pinschers.[8] Ulf Buck claims he can read people's futures by feeling their naked buttocks.[5]
See also
References
- ^ Pillai, Shruti (2016-12-29). "Some Fortune Tellers Read Hands, Some Read Foreheads. And Then There Are Those Who Read Butts!". scoopwhoop.com. Retrieved 2021-02-05.
- ^ Carrol, Robert Todd. "Rumplogy for Dummies". The Skeptic's Dictionary.
- ^ a b "Jacqueline Stallone's Rumpology Reports!". Retrieved 2007-06-05.
- ^ Reiter, Amy (September 13, 1999). "This is Sly's mom on crack". Salon.com.
- ^ a b Tattersall, Nick (July 9, 2003). "Blind Psychic Gropes Buttocks to See Future". Sounding Circle. Reuters. Archived from the original on July 8, 2007. Retrieved 2007-04-25.
- ^ "Have a rumpologist read your bottom". Metro. January 5, 2009.
- ^ "rumpology". The Skeptic's Dictionary.
- ^ Reiter, Amy (March 21, 2001). "Streisand: Stallone's mom's butt prints are hot!". Salon.com.
External links
- Rumpology from the Skeptic's Dictionary
- Rumpology on Jackie Stallone's webpage