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Dino Merlin: Revision history

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  • curprev 14:3414:34, 27 April 2023‎ Wesoree talk contribs‎ m 24,738 bytes +6,530‎ Reverted edits by PrijavaBal (talk) (AV) undo Tags: AntiVandal Rollback
  • curprev 14:3314:33, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 18,208 bytes −1,335‎ The text appears to be well-written and informative, providing readers with information on Dino's philanthropic activities. However, I can suggest a few minor revisions that could make the text clearer or more concise: In the first sentence, you could consider rephrasing "out of public sight" to "away from public attention" to avoid ambiguity. In the second sentence, you could replace "over dozen" with "over a dozen" to make it grammatically correct. In the third sentence, you could consider ad undo Tags: Reverted references removed Visual edit Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 14:2214:22, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 19,543 bytes −49‎ However, I noticed a couple of points that could be clarified or elaborated on: In the sentence "The album eventually turned into a classic and became the highest selling album of the region in the last 30 years," it's not clear which region is being referred to. Based on the previous sentence, it seems likely that the region in question is the former Yugoslav republics, but it would be helpful to clarify this explicitly. The sentence "This was the largest crowd ever to assemble in the national undo Tags: Reverted references removed Visual edit Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 11:0911:09, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 19,592 bytes +66‎ Bold undo Tags: Reverted Visual edit Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 11:0611:06, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 19,526 bytes −1,026‎ →‎Solo career: Here is an edited version of the text that incorporates the suggested improvements: There are a few grammatical errors in the text. Here are some corrected sentences: In the first sentence, "Dervišhalidović" should be preceded by a personal pronoun such as "He" or "Dino Merlin." In the second sentence, "six studio albums" should be "sixth studio albums." In the third sentence, "Merlin" should be "the band Merlin." In the fifth sentence, "it was no surprise that he went on a... undo Tags: Reverted references removed Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 10:5810:58, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 20,552 bytes −511‎ →‎First album, period of struggle: There are no significant grammatical errors in the given text. However, there are a few minor errors that could be corrected: In the sentence "During this time, he married his high-school sweetheart Amela, and soon found himself working two shifts a day at a metal factory in the suburbs of Sarajevo in order to support his newly formed marriage", the phrase "newly formed marriage" could be rephrased to "newly formed union" or "newly formed relationship" as... undo Tags: Reverted references removed Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 09:5509:55, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 21,063 bytes −927‎ →‎Current success, Billboard recognition: There are a few minor grammatical errors in the text that can be corrected: In the first sentence, "returned to the stage with his eleventh album" should be "returned to the stage with his eleventh album, "Hotel Nacional". In the second sentence, "immediately upon release due to unprecedented online sales in the region" should be "immediately upon its release due to unprecedented online sales in the region." In the fourth sentence, "Sophie Ellis-Be... undo Tags: Reverted references removed Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 00:4100:41, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 21,990 bytes +53‎ →‎Current success, Billboard recognition: In the final sentence, it could be rephrased to read something like "The Hotel Nacional World Tour broke records as the largest tour ever produced by an artist from Southeast Europe, attracting an audience of 700,000 people across four continents." This phrasing makes it clear that the tour itself was the record-breaking achievement, rather than the box office sales alone. undo Tags: Reverted Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 00:3900:39, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 21,937 bytes +20‎ →‎Current success, Billboard recognition: here are some additional improvements to enhance the clarity and flow of the text: In the first sentence, it would be helpful to specify who Dino is. For example, "After a 6-year hiatus, the musician Dino Merlin returned to the stage with his eleventh album Hotel Nacional." Instead of using the phrase "unprecedented online sales in the region," it would be more informative to include specific sales figures or percentages to give the reader a better... undo Tags: Reverted Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 00:3100:31, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 21,917 bytes −637‎ →‎Early years: There are a few minor grammatical errors that could be corrected for clarity and readability: In the second sentence, "he helped Dino buy his first guitar" could be changed to "she helped Dino buy his first guitar" for consistency with the preceding sentence. In the third sentence, "He penned his first song at 14 years old" could be revised to "He wrote his first song at the age of 14" for better phrasing. In the fourth sentence, "Mirsad's younger brother, Mensur Lutvica, pl... undo Tags: Reverted references removed Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 00:2500:25, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 22,554 bytes −1,254‎ Imorovement and better English undo Tags: Reverted references removed Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 00:2300:23, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 23,808 bytes −885‎ →‎Early life: Better improvmeent and correct English undo Tags: Reverted references removed Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 00:0800:08, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 24,693 bytes −26‎ →‎Early life undo Tags: Reverted Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 00:0800:08, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 24,719 bytes +1‎ No edit summary undo Tags: Reverted Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 00:0500:05, 27 April 2023‎ PrijavaBal talk contribs‎ 24,718 bytes −20‎ →‎Early life undo Tags: Reverted Mobile edit Mobile web edit
  • curprev 00:0300:03, 27 April 2023‎ Taking Out The Trash talk contribs‎ m 24,738 bytes +885‎ Reverted edits by PrijavaBal (talk) to last version by Rkieferbaum undo Tag: Rollback

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