Talk:Masrour Barzani: Difference between revisions
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You can see the reason for deletion at the file description page linked above. —[[User:Community Tech bot|Community Tech bot]] ([[User talk:Community Tech bot|talk]]) 21:51, 10 July 2019 (UTC) |
You can see the reason for deletion at the file description page linked above. —[[User:Community Tech bot|Community Tech bot]] ([[User talk:Community Tech bot|talk]]) 21:51, 10 July 2019 (UTC) |
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== Proposed changes to lead == |
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{{request edit}} |
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Hi, I’m replacing my [https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Talk:Masrour_Barzani&oldid=925618616 original post] here to try to make it clearer. |
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Hi, I work at the Council of Ministers within the [[Kurdistan Regional Government]], so I’m here as a paid editor. I've put a connected contributor tag above. |
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I've drafted a proposed updated lead in my [[User:Halgurd1/sandbox|sandbox]]. The changes I'm proposing are to: |
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I think the lead to this article could do with a few updates – specifically: |
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#Start with his role as Prime Minister rather than his Kurdistan Democratic Party membership |
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#Include the terms "autonomous federal" to describe the Kurdistan Region, as designated by the 2005 Iraqi constitution – see timeline at the bottom of this [https://www.bbc.com/news/world-middle-east-28147263 BBC article] |
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#Correct "former Chancellor of the Kurdistan Region Security Council" – he's still the Chancellor of the KRSC (see [https://www.kurdistan24.net/en/news/b84d2a43-a2c0-4b13-8405-3298695ea297 this Kurdistan 24 article]) |
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#Also as per the article above, the correct number for the vote count in June is actually 87, not 88 – while 88 MPs voted for him, 87 was the number which Parliament recorded. |
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#Correct the June 2019 vote count, which was 87 not 88 (see same K24 article above) |
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#Masoud Barzani |
#Correct "President Masoud Barzani" – Masoud Barzani is the former President |
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#I think it could also benefit from just a little more in the way of a summary of his biography as a whole, in line with most BLPs. |
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#Include a short career summary sentence – Peshmerga, UK and US education, return to the Kurdistan Region |
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I have worked on a possible version in my [[User:Halgurd1/sandbox|sandbox]] which incorporates these points. If anyone has some time to have a look and get back to me here that would be great. Thanks. [[User:Halgurd1|Halgurd1]] ([[User talk:Halgurd1|talk]]) 07:10, 11 November 2019 (UTC) |
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Let me know if these suggestions are acceptable. Thank you. [[User:Halgurd1|Halgurd1]] ([[User talk:Halgurd1|talk]]) 10:49, 4 December 2019 (UTC) |
Revision as of 10:49, 4 December 2019
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You can see the reason for deletion at the file description page linked above. —Community Tech bot (talk) 21:51, 10 July 2019 (UTC)
Proposed changes to lead
![]() | It is requested that an edit be made to the semi-protected article at Masrour Barzani. (edit · history · last · links · protection log)
This template must be followed by a complete and specific description of the request, that is, specify what text should be removed and a verbatim copy of the text that should replace it. "Please change X" is not acceptable and will be rejected; the request must be of the form "please change X to Y".
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Hi, I’m replacing my original post here to try to make it clearer.
I've drafted a proposed updated lead in my sandbox. The changes I'm proposing are to:
- Start with his role as Prime Minister rather than his Kurdistan Democratic Party membership
- Include the terms "autonomous federal" to describe the Kurdistan Region, as designated by the 2005 Iraqi constitution – see timeline at the bottom of this BBC article
- Correct "former Chancellor of the Kurdistan Region Security Council" – he's still the Chancellor of the KRSC (see this Kurdistan 24 article)
- Correct the June 2019 vote count, which was 87 not 88 (see same K24 article above)
- Correct "President Masoud Barzani" – Masoud Barzani is the former President
- Include a short career summary sentence – Peshmerga, UK and US education, return to the Kurdistan Region
Let me know if these suggestions are acceptable. Thank you. Halgurd1 (talk) 10:49, 4 December 2019 (UTC)