Collier Row
Collier Row is a place in north east London in the London Borough of Havering. It is a suburban development north of Romford, located 14 miles (22.5 km) north east of Charing Cross.
The area is based on a large housing estate built during the 1930s as part of the inter-war London housing expansion, with shopping facilities around a central crossroads. Its name originates from charcoal burners who used to occupy the area.
Remains of Roman settlement have been uncovered in the area.[1]
Collier Row was formerly part of the county of Essex until the formation of Greater London in 1965.
Transport and locale
The area is not connected to the London Underground or National Rail networks, however Hainault tube station, Newbury Park tube station(central line) and Romford railway station are nearby. Transport for London bus routes 175, 247, 252, 294 ,365 and 375 and commercial route 575 from Epping to Romford and Lakeside serve the local area and it is planned that a future extension of the East London Transit could serve the area.
The A12 (Eastern Avenue), which runs through Collier Row at its southern end, leads to London and the east coast of Essex, and crosses the M25 on its eastern section.
Nearest places
Education
Situated on Havering Road, Parklands School (both primary and junior) has been open for over half a century. In 1995 the school was given "Beacon Status" due to the high standards of education provided. The school is one of the largest primary schools in the area. The school has a quad area which is home to many animals, in the past the quad has been home to lambs, chickens, guinea pigs, rabbits, a tiger, a shark, a penguin, an elephant, a midget and a werewolf.
Collier News
Collier News is a well known newsagents on Collier Row Lane. Owner is Dilip who was known for appearing on TV Programme The Family[disambiguation needed]. Dilip is known for his smooth chatup lines with many mothers who visit his shop after dropping their children off at Parklands school. Dilip is rumoured to be appearing in the final UK series of Big Brother.
Tom Bean Viewing
Tom Bean is a Collier Row resident known for once driving a 25 year old Nissan Sunny that cost him £50. Tom is well known for his job interview skills, often agreeing to disagree with the interviewer and particpating in arguments with answers based on no fact or lack of evidence. He can be found often in William Hills Bookmakers down Gobions Avenue or picking Dave up from Mayhem Paintball.
Tom Bean once claimed that you can drive to Bradford from Collier Row in 2 and a half hours.
He has not been seen since the summer of 2013 where it was reported in the Romford Recorder that he had taken residence in the local YMCA
Bradley Cheung
Bradley Cheung is the local Cheung Head. He can often be found in Lawns Park, chilling with Tom Bean or poncing cigarettes down the Bull pub. Cheung Head is known to make some over the top claims - such as achieving 7 stars on Grand Theft Auto, being able to run at 60 miles per hour,and claiming that Chinese takeaway food is delivered from Japan. One memorable phrase from the Cheung Monster was "Literature? Isnt that words and shit?" Bradleys most notable quotes are "Gez" (meaning Geez), "Got any Cheung?" or "spare me a twos on that!"
"Tesh" Patel
Meaty Patel was the first Indian man to take up residence in Collier Row. He is known for his love of all things curry. He currently is barred from entering Koshos in Romford for the next 108 years. Meaty becomes easily intoxicated when out with the lads and enters a period of rage known in Mumbai as the "Vindaloo Fury". His bitter rival is known as Northern Shaun.
Tesh has ambitions of one day becoming the local dentist, with a theme of the more you scream, the more likely he is to take off his clothes and dance to the Eastenders theme tune. As a child he was once molested by Sexual Harassment Panda after being mistaken for as a George Graham lookalike.
Chad the Money Muncher
Chad was the first ever dog to seek refuge in Collier Row. He was of Jewish descent and moved to Collier Row after World War 2 with only 20p and two can's of Pedigree. His greatest day came when he met Martin Midz, who at the time was a male gigolo. Martin Midz fell instantly in love with Chad and they never looked back. One of chad's finest moments was when Martin forgot to feed him for two weeks because he was too busy watching the darts. So Chad took it upon himself to consume a twenty pound note, which was inserted through the letter box by a man named Meatworth.
Sadly Chad is no longer with us, but at least we can say he lived a long and successful life. R.I.P Chad.
References
- ^ Havering London Borough Council - A history of Collier Row
