Talk:1986 World Snooker Championship/GA1

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Reviewer: Cavie78 (talk · contribs) 19:31, 8 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]


I'll take a look at this Cavie78 (talk) 19:31, 8 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Many thanks for taking this on. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 09:03, 9 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

  • Looks good, but would nice if you could change at least one "event" here for "tournament"? "sole ranking event. Prior to the event, bookmakers' odds for a Johnson victory were 150–1. A total of 20 century breaks were made during the event"
    • Changed one to "competition", and one to "event" - I think "competition" works, but let me know if not. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 09:03, 9 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Overview

  • "the modern era" this can mean all sorts of different things - clarify what you mean
  • "The championship" - "The 1986 championship" (you've only talked about the WSC in general in this section up to this point)
  • " Joe Davis won the first World Championship in 1927..." It seems odd to me that you talk about the history of the WSC, then the 1986 tournament, then go back to talking about the history of the WSC. I think these final two sentences would work better before the sentence that currently begins "The championship featured 32 professional players..."

Prize fund

  • "with a bonus of £80,000 if a player made a maximum break" Clarify that this bonus would go to the player making the 147 - it sounds a bit like £80,000 would just be added to the general prize fund
  • "The winner of the event won a total of £70,000. The breakdown of prize money for the event" Again, can we lose an "event" for "tournament"? I think it would be better to say "£70,000 was reserved for the winner of the event [or tournament], with a full breakdown of prize money as shown below" or similar
  • Any details about prizes for qualifying? You mention Hendry winning £1,750 in the following section
    • Section amended. Looks like there was no prize money before the third qualifying round - the B&H Yearbook source shows the money received by each professional player for each tournament during the season. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 14:20, 9 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
      • Does this still tally with the total price fund being £350,000? Cavie78 (talk) 15:45, 9 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Qualifying

  • "during match against Paddy Browne" -> "during his match against Paddy Browne"
  • "and earnt £1,750" -> "and earned him a prize of £1,750"
  • "conceded the frame when" -> "conceded the next frame when"
  • "behind with the brown to black balls, totalling 22 points, still on the table, which meant he could draw the frame" -> "behind despite the brown to black balls, totalling 22 points - enough for him to draw the game, still being on the table"
  • "18th frame from 53 points behind" -> "18th frame while 53 points behind'
  • "and lost 8–10" -> "and lost the match 8–10"
  • "green to born" -> "green to brown"
  • "in a traffic collision that injured" -> "in a traffic collision which injured"
  • "He beat Omprakesh Agrawal 10–5" I feel like it would be better to say something like "Despite the accident, Newbury beat Omprakesh Agrawal 10–5"
  • "Newbury became the first player in this year's competition to qualify for the Crucible rounds against a top 16 player," ?!! In the following sentence you say he lost in Round 4 of qualifying to John Spencer, so he didn't qualify for the Crucible?

First Round

  • "The first round were played as the best-of-19-frames matches over two sessions, and all took place between 19 and 24 Apri" -> "The first round was played as best-of-19-frame matches over two sessions, and took place between 19 and 24 April"
  • "lost the first seven frames against Mike Hallett, and ended their first session 1–8 behind" -> "lost the first seven frames of his match against Mike Hallett, and ended the first session 1–8 behind"
  • "Like Spencer in 1978, Terry Griffiths in 1980, Cliff Thorburn in 1981 and Steve Davis in 1982, Taylor was unable to retain his first world championship, known as the Crucible Curse." -> something like "Like Spencer in 1978, Terry Griffiths in 1980, Cliff Thorburn in 1981 and Steve Davis in 1982, Taylor was unable to retain his first world championship. This inability of a first time champion to defend their title has become known as the Crucible Curse."
  • "Second seed Davis beat Ray Edmonds" I think it would be better to say "Second seed Steve Davis beat Ray Edmonds" here, just to clarify (given that Fred Davis also took part in the qualifiers)

Second round

  • "The second round matches were played as the best-of-25 frames matches over three sessions" -> "The second round was played as best-of-25 frames matches over three sessions"
  • "and all took place between 24 and 28 April" -> "and took place between 24 and 28 April"
  • "Davis and Mountjoy" -> "I think it would be better to say Steve Davis and Doug Mountjoy here for the same reason as the mention of Davis in the First Round section
  • "Mounjoy did not pot a ball" -> "Mountjoy did not pot a ball"

Quarter-finals

  • "The quarter-finals were played as the best-of-25 frames matches over three sessions on 29 and 30 April" -> "The quarter-finals were played as best-of-25 frames matches over three sessions on 29 and 30 April"
  • "in-a-row" -> "in a row"
  • "Barbara Thorburn, in Canada, gave birth to their second child during the match" -> "Barbara Thorburn, gave birth to their second child in the couple's native Canada during the match"

Semi-finals

  • "The semi-finals were played between" -> "The semi-finals took place between" (to avoid repetition of "played")
  • "their first session ahead 4–3" -> "their first session 4–3 ahead"
  • "to win at 16–8"
  • but tied the match at 3–3" -> "although he did go on to win the game and tie the match at 3–3"

Final

  • "following which Johnson" - "after which Johnson" (to avoid repetition of "following")
  • "Johnson had another run" -> "Johnson won another run"
  • "crowd response was in favour of Johnson" -> "the crowd responsed in favour of Johnson"
  • "as well as accompanying" -> "as well as him accompanying"
  • "This was Johnson's only ranking event win in his career. He would win two non-ranking tournaments at the 1987 Scottish Masters and 1989 Norwich Union Grand Prix." -> "This was Johnson's only ranking event win in his career, although he would go on to win two non-ranking tournaments - the 1987 Scottish Masters and 1989 Norwich Union Grand Prix."
  • "The odds on Johnson was" -> "The odds on Johnson were"
  • "against winning the event" -> "against him winning the event"

Other

  • You should add a detailed fair use rationale to the image of the programme
  • Sources look good, no copyvios
  • Placing on hold Cavie78 (talk) 15:45, 9 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • P.S. Could you or @Lee Vilenski: add info about Hunter's wildcard to the Paul Hunter article? You added something to the GA review page but not the article itself
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