Talk:On Sight
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Include accessdate at all times
[edit]I am currently editing and have added this information for a reference in the Controversy section because the original editor didn't include the accessdate for some reason. --Kyle Peake (talk) 09:05, 10 December 2018 (UTC)
GA Review
[edit]The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewing |
- This review is transcluded from Talk:On Sight/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: BeatlesLedTV (talk · contribs) 23:01, 2 February 2019 (UTC)
- First GA review; I'll have it done today. BeatlesLedTV (talk) 23:08, 2 February 2019 (UTC)
- I am responding below as to how I have fixed the issues. --Kyle Peake (talk) 18:45, 5 February 2019 (UTC)
Lead and infobox
[edit]- The reference in the infobox isn't needed, as that's better described in the body
- Removed.
- Currently, the lead is too short and the sentences seem disjointed; go straight from opening to sample to reception to controversy. What about chart listings? (since it managed to chart on two different charts)
- Beefed up lead, including chart listings and separated into two paragraphs.
Composition
[edit]- Quotes within quotes should be single quotation marks instead of double
- Fixed, but left "On Sight" with those speech marks because it's a song title inside the quote.
- "The song contains a studio recreation sang by a choir of "Sermon..." – that reads very weirdly, why not "a studio recreation of "Sermon...Family, sung by a choir."?
- Changed order to read better.
Critical reception
[edit]- Steph Blasnik's quote is a direct quote, which should be in double quotation marks. The punctuation is also inside the quotes while other quotes aren't.
- Same goes for Chris Martins' quote
- Added all in double quotation marks as should be done and if you mean punctuation inside the quotes like commas then that can be included, but I removed the [] from quotes.
Controversy
[edit]- Why are the lyrics referred to as 'lines'?
- Changed to lyrics.
- MTV does not go in italics
- Removed italics formatting.
- Along with that, it was Maurice Bobb of MTV who wrote the quote.
- Added his name.
- "...effect." and West never responded to the ADPA.[13]" Reference should be after the end quote and the ref itself states West had yet to respond (as of June 19, 2013). In the almost 6 years since, did West ever actually respond? The fact is that the source here does not say he never responded.
- Updated to read 'and West had yet to respond to the ADPA at the time'
Charts
[edit]- Fine
References
[edit]- Many of these should be archived, since many are from 2013.
- Archived multiple references
Final comments and verdict
[edit]The main problem with the article is that at its current state it is incomplete.
- There is no 'credits and personnel' section
- Added it now with a reference.
- A 'commercial performance' section is needed (even though there are only two listings, there should still be one)
- Included this section with both of the chart positions.
- The article also has no background info, such as why did Daft Punk work on this? or what was the genesis of the song? (especially since the entire album was scrapped and recorded in a matter of weeks)
- Added a background section about Daft Punk and when the song was first heard. Also, the album wasn't recorded in a matter of weeks, where'd you get that false information from? See Yeezus Wiki.
Because of these issues, I sadly had to ✗ Fail this. Maybe with a greater expansion it can become a GA in the future, but in its current state, it is not GA quality. Perhaps there's not enough info out there on this specific song to ensure a GA. However, I see you in particular have been expanding many of West's song pages, which is really cool to see (thanks for your expansions on "Ultralight Beam"). Keep up the good work, and hopefully more of his songs can become GA's in the future! BeatlesLedTV (talk) 23:44, 2 February 2019 (UTC)
Help out?
[edit]BeatlesLedTV I have found enough notable live performances of the song to create such a section, but I would like to ask do I remove the debut performance from background and extended sample from composition after I have added this section that would also include them, or do I keep them in their sections as well as the live performances section? As well as this, I'd like to ask how many refs should be archived? --Kyle Peake (talk) 17:23, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake Remove the sentence about the Yeezus Tour from composition and move it to live performances. If you can find more info regarding the performance at the Governors Ball Music Festival then add that to live performances and keep the sentence in background, as it does provide background. Also, every ref needs to be archived. I'll take care of that. BeatlesLedTV (talk) 17:31, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- BeatlesLedTV The section has now been created by me, but two questions about it: 1. Is the lead sentence fine or should I reference The Yeezus Tour instead? 2. Do you see any issues with the section? --Kyle Peake (talk) 19:06, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake I'll post my response in GA review. BeatlesLedTV (talk) 19:27, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- BeatlesLedTV I have responded to your response and will now be trying to expand the composition section further with ref 6, will ask if I need your help. --Kyle Peake (talk) 20:00, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- BeatlesLedTV Now have expanded the composition section even further, do you believe this article can pass now? Also, review Father Stretch My Hands soon please. --Kyle Peake (talk) 21:19, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake Don't tell me what to do. ;) I'll give this one last look over and then I'll get to "Father". BeatlesLedTV (talk) 22:12, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- BeatlesLedTV Haha sorry if I was getting bossy, but much thanks for this article being passed and I will now add the good article icon to the top! Kyle Peake (talk) 22:32, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake Actually you gotta let the bot do that. BeatlesLedTV (talk) 22:33, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- BeatlesLedTV Almost did it then, thanks for stopping me just in time. Can't wait to see your good article review for Father! Kyle Peake (talk) 22:34, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake Actually you gotta let the bot do that. BeatlesLedTV (talk) 22:33, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- BeatlesLedTV Haha sorry if I was getting bossy, but much thanks for this article being passed and I will now add the good article icon to the top! Kyle Peake (talk) 22:32, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake Don't tell me what to do. ;) I'll give this one last look over and then I'll get to "Father". BeatlesLedTV (talk) 22:12, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- BeatlesLedTV Now have expanded the composition section even further, do you believe this article can pass now? Also, review Father Stretch My Hands soon please. --Kyle Peake (talk) 21:19, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- BeatlesLedTV I have responded to your response and will now be trying to expand the composition section further with ref 6, will ask if I need your help. --Kyle Peake (talk) 20:00, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- Kyle Peake I'll post my response in GA review. BeatlesLedTV (talk) 19:27, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
- BeatlesLedTV The section has now been created by me, but two questions about it: 1. Is the lead sentence fine or should I reference The Yeezus Tour instead? 2. Do you see any issues with the section? --Kyle Peake (talk) 19:06, 24 March 2019 (UTC)
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