Talk:Out of This Club/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 09:38, 4 December 2022 (UTC)

Good Article review progress box

Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV () 3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant () Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

I will conduct this review today! --K. Peake 09:38, 4 December 2022 (UTC)

Infobox and lead

• Shouldn't the studio be identified as The Chocolate Factory?

•  Done Sorry, misread the booklet.

• Pipe Chicago, Illinois to Chicago in the infobox

•  Done

• "It features its songwriters Polow da Don and its producer" → "The song features guest appearances from record producer Polow da Don and singer"

•  Done

• Add a sentence after the above one mentioning who wrote and produced it

•  Done

• "In the United States the song" → "In the United States, the song"

•  Done

• Pipe child pornography to R. Kelly#Early sexual abuse accusations (1990s–2000s)

•  Not done Piped it to Kelly#Exposure of child sexual abuse material and indictment (2002)

• Simply change the "over" part of comp to mentioning piano melodies, minus any quotation marks

•  Done

• "It received mixed reviews from contemporary critics who either complimented or criticized" → "The song received mixed reviews from music critics, who were split towards"

•  Done

• "platforms following new allegations" → "platforms, following new allegations"

•  Done

Production and release

• "and Jamal "Polow Da Don" Jones," → "and Jamal "Polow da Don" Jones," with the pipe
•  Done Scrap my comment.
  •  Comment: Hmm, sorry, don't follow. =]
• "collaborated with the latter who, previously" → "collaborated with the record producer, who previously" to be specific

•  Done

• Pipe Abel Garibaldi to Die Warzau

•  Done

• "Jeff Meeks and Eric Schlotzer" → "Jeff Meeks, and Eric Schlotzer"

•  Done

• Remove overly obvious wikilink on Chicago, Illinois

•  Done

• Pipe mixed to Audio mixing (recorded music)

•  Done

• "and Jaycen Joshua with Kelly" → "and Jaycen Joshua, with Kelly"

•  Done

• Pipe programmed to Programming (music)

•  Done

• Remove the comma after second studio album

•  Done

• Pipe urban contemporary to Urban contemporary music

•  Done

• Remove the comma after second single

•  Done

• "follows Kelly's acquittal" → "came a couple of months after Kelly's acquittal" removing the part from the end of the sentence in this context

•  Done

Composition and reception

• Audio sample looks good!
• ""Out of This Club" is" → "Musically, "Out of This Club" is"

•  Done

• ""midtempo jam",[3] production is" → ""mid-tempo jam",[3] the production is" per the source

•  Done

• ""plush beat" which results" → ""plush beat", which results"

•  Done

• "a cascading fashion" with the artists" → "a cascading fashion", with the artists"

•  Done

• "According Joey Guerra from the" → "According to Joey Guerra from the"

•  Done

• Pipe sugar daddy to Sugar dating

•  Done

• The party lifestyle part is not sourced

•  Comment: You mean to remove the pipe to Playboy lifestyle

• "is a possbile" → "is a possible"

•  Done

• Pipe Usher to Usher (musician)

•  Done

• "Polow Da Don's rap line," → "Polow da Don's rap line,"

•  Done

• "which was produced by himself." → "which he had previously produced."

•  Done

• "and producer commenting he is" → "and producer, commenting he is"

•  Done

• "and noted down" → "and he noted down"

•  Done

• "didn't expect anything else from Kelly characterizing it" → "lacked expectations for Kelly, characterizing the song"

•  Done

• "criticized Kelly's songwriting describing it as" → "derided Kelly's songwriting as"

•  Done

• "as "phoned-in" adding he" → "as "phoned-in", adding he"

•  Done

• "lambasted "Out Of This Club" highlighting it" → "lambasted "Out Of This Club", pinpointing it"

•  Done

• Pipe Rohypnol to Flunitrazepam

•  Done

• Add the Bubbling Under position as the final para of this section, as that is commercial reception

•  Done

Chart

• "which represents the 25 songs which failed" → "which represented the 25 songs that failed" since the chart no longer exists

•  Done

• Make this the section after removal

•  Done

Removal from album and sale

• "their former label, Interscope Records to remove the song from all digital and streaming platforms," → "their former label Interscope Records to remove the song from all streaming platforms," per the source

•  Done

• "Beginning April of that year," → "Beginning April 2019,"

•  Done

• "with Heat magazine member Kimberly Wyatt" → "with Heat magazine, member Kimberly Wyatt"

•  Done

• "was out of the group's hands." → "was out of the group's hands:"

•  Done

References

• Copyvio score looks fairly decent at 36.7%!!
• Cite Radio & Records as work/website instead on ref 4

•  Done

• Remove the publisher from ref 7

•  Done

• WP:OVERLINK of Billboard on ref 18

•  Done

• Pipe Vulture to Vulture.com on ref 19 per MOS:LINK2SECT

•  Done

Final comments and verdict

•  On hold until all of the issues are fixed! --K. Peake 21:21, 4 December 2022 (UTC)

  Hey, thanks for doing this! I have done the edits! MrHyacinth (talk) 02:59, 9 December 2022 (UTC)

Pinging @Kyle Peake: Onegreatjoke (talk) 23:39, 10 December 2022 (UTC)

• Onegreatjoke Nice work, but you still need to either remove or source the party lifestyle part since none of the refs mention it. --K. Peake 11:20, 13 December 2022 (UTC)

  Now? It was written in the Blender article. MrHyacinth (talk) 23:47, 15 December 2022 (UTC)

  @Kyle Peake MrHyacinth (talk) 23:48, 15 December 2022 (UTC)

• ✓ Pass now, nice job on this! --K. Peake 08:56, 16 December 2022 (UTC)