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Kia ora, the draft has quite a few separate sections and I think they could be re-organised to read more smoothly and to create a more cohesive article. The information on his university studies, career in fisheries, community roles and politics could all go together as "Career" and then a subsection of this could be "Conservation work" with the current sections 1, 2 and 3 under this heading. Then there would be "Honours and awards" and then a brief "Personal life" section right at the end with the details of his family and health.
MurielMary (talk) 08:10, 9 January 2022 (UTC)[reply]
