Wikipedia:Peer review/College Republicans/archive1

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College Republicans[edit]

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because it just underwent a pretty large expansion, and I want to make sure it flows well and covers enough material. If you check out this article's history, it is a popular target for content blanking, POV-pushing ([1], [2]), linkspam, and bad attitudes. I greatly expanded this, cited everything, and tried to balance the tone of the article between the very real scandals and controversies versus the long history and strong influence of the organization. Essentially, I tried to make this a legitimate piece. I am most concerned with flow, tone, and Reliable Sourcing. Thanks, Dr. Ivo Shandor (talk) 05:51, 20 September 2008 (UTC)

Ruhrfisch comments: As requested, here are some suggestions for improvement. If you want more comments, please ask here.

  • The lead should be an accessible and inviting overview of the whole article and should be expanded to more than just one paragraph. Nothing important should be in the lead only - since it is a summary, it should all be repeated in the body of the article itself. My rule of thumb is to include every header in the lead in some way - please see WP:LEAD.  Done
  • Some sections still need refs - for example Each Republican state federation and local chapter maintains a degree of autonomy from the national committee. Locally elected officers are responsible for the majority of on-campus activities, which may include organizing conservative speakers and debates with the local chapter of College Democrats of America. needs a ref. My rule of thumb is that every quote, every statistic, every extraordinary claim and every paragraph needs a ref.  Done
  • Per WP:CITE references come AFTER punctuation (with no spaces), and are usually at the end of a sentence or phrase. See WP:CITE and WP:V Done
  • Direct quotes need refs, such as During election years, the CRNC focuses on developing a "mass based youth effort" directed toward ... Done
  • Any chance for a free image? Doing...
  • Explain abbreviations before first use, such CRNC in The CRNC organizes election-year field representative ... Done
  • Typo?? ... which was finally sun off in 1970 to prevent infighting among the two groups.[3] Done
  • Big gaps in history - what happened between 1924 and 1970? -  Done
  • This is about the national organization, should there be some description of what local chapters are like / do locally?  Done

Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Wikipedia:Peer review/backlog. Yours, Ruhrfisch ><>°° 03:17, 26 September 2008 (UTC)