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Wikipedia:Peer review/History of Denver/archive1

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This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because I've rewritten major sections of this article and would like some feedback. Any suggestion on what information to include in the intro would be appreciated.

Thanks, Killian441 (talk) 21:15, 20 December 2013 (UTC)[reply]

 Doing... I am starting this peer review, but I will not have time to be thorough. Other editors are welcome to help! Madalibi (talk) 02:31, 4 January 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks for the feedback. I've had a busy start to the new year, but I will start to work on updating the article. Thank you again for taking the time to look this over. -Killian441 (talk) 23:40, 16 January 2014 (UTC)[reply]

A few comments by Madalibi

[edit]

Hi Killian441! This is an interesting, well-written, and well-structured article. Unfortunately I don't have time to read it thoroughly, so here are just a few comments.

  • References:
    • There are a lot of footnotes that don't point to a bibliographic entry, and many bibliographic entries with no footnotes to go with them. Sometimes it's just a formatting problem, as when note 13 cites "Leonard 1990", a work that is formatted as "Leonard & Noel 1990" in the bibliography. I won't go through the list if citation errors one by one. You can use the very convenient script User:Ucucha/HarvErrors.js to check for them yourself. Once the script is installed, you will just see them automatically. All the books that are not cited in the article should go in a section titled "Further reading" or something.
    • If you're planning to apply for good article status eventually, you will need page numbers for the books you cite. Browse through your footnotes to see which entries are missing page numbers.
  • Section titles should not be fully capitalized: check MOS:SECTIONCAPS.
  • Lead section. Here you should just summarize the history of Denver as it's recounted in the article. You should start by stating clearly where Denver is, and what the scope of "Denver" is (I see you already do that), then say when it was founded and by whom. You can tell the story chronologically in as few words as possible, but trying to be complete at the same time. You could then use the last (probably 3rd or 4th) paragraph of the lede to explain the significance of the history of Denver, or important themes in the history of the city. I'd be glad to comment on further versions once they're ready. For more ideas, you can also read WP:LEAD.
  • Images: when I use an image, I like to point to something intriguing that will make the reader feel like reading the text that goes with it. Some captions are excellent, like the portrait of James Denver with his namesake city or the picture of the Zephyr and its record-breaking trip. This is just the kind of tidbit that will attract a reader's attention. But the "Painting of Denver in 1859" with its wagon carts and tipis is just crying for a more interesting caption! In the caption for the "Front exterior of Union Station", you could explain the significance of that station in the history of Denver. Same for the Tabor Grand Opera House, the State Capitol, Jefferson Territory, etc. For more ideas, see WP:CAPTION.

Ok, that's all I have time for right now, but that should at least get you started! Cheers, Madalibi (talk) 14:09, 3 January 2014 (UTC)[reply]