Wikipedia:Peer review/Prester John/archive1

Prester John

I requested a peer review to see if this article needs anything. I think especially the "Later legend" section could use some work.--Cuchullain 20:49, 22 October 2005 (UTC)

You appear to have a great a great deal on expanding this article. Kudos to you! Here are the first things that jump out at me as needing work:

• The introduction should be expanded. For an article of this size it should be at least two paragraphs but no more than three.
• The article is filled with many names. While most of them have articles, they should be explained a bit in the text. Nothing elaborate, simply something like "ecclesiastical historian and bishop Eusebius quotes from Saint Iraneus..." Otherwise the article tends towards becoming a jumble of unfamiliar names.
• The article has many short paragraphs. Try either expanding the information or connecting shorter paragraphs to create larger ones.

I hope this is helpful! *Exeunt* Ganymead 21:47, 22 October 2005 (UTC)

• Nice - but desperatly needs references. Also, I think that Kingdom of Aksum should be mentioned. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus ^Talk 02:30, 1 November 2005 (UTC)
  • Having worked a bit on Axum-related articles, I can't think of any significant connection between the legend of Prester John & the history of that ancient kingdom. The later kings of Ethiopia did trace their lineage to Axum & before, but locating Prester John in Africa was a later development in the evolution of the story, inspired by stories of the contemporary victories of Solomonid kings over their Muslim rivals in the 14th & 15th centuries. -- llywrch 23:08, 1 November 2005 (UTC)
    • Well, the connection is simple: Axum converted to christianity, thus laying fundation for the local Prester John myth. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus ^Talk 19:03, 12 November 2005 (UTC)