Wikipedia:Peer review/Virginia Minstrels/archive1
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I've listed this article for peer review because I'd like suggestions on additional potential subsections of the article.
Thanks, Jre1991 (talk) 03:57, 3 April 2018 (UTC)
Comments from Tim riley
[edit]The brief existing article is all right as far as it goes. It isn't clear what "potential subsections" you have in mind. It depends first of all on what further relevant and useful information is available from reliable sources. A typical article on such a topic might have sections on these lines:
- Background
- Peak years
- Decline
- Critical reception
- Legacy
Another possible model is in the article to which this one is linked: Minstrel show.
Note also that the lead should contain a brief summary of all important points in the main text, but should not contain anything that isn't in the main text.
I hope these few points are useful. – Tim riley talk 11:11, 8 April 2018 (UTC)
Comments from Lillian
[edit]Mostly I think you should edit the sentence structure through out. Sentences like the first one are a little clunky. A few suggestions here:
The Virginia Minstrels or Virginia Serenaders was a group of 19th-century American entertainers who helped invent the entertainment form known as the minstrel show.
While they weren't the first blackface performers to band together and present a show, they were the first to present a concert.
etc. There are just ways to streamline the language to make it easier to understand. Hope that's helpful. Comments by Lilliemer8519 (talk) 16:17, 10 April 2018 (UTC)
Jordan's Peer Review
[edit]The lead section is great! Very engaging and clearly states what the article will be about although it might be a bit of a run on sentence. It is missing a citation though.
I can see the sections you've added which I think will make the structure much more robust. You should definitely think about adding to the "Significant Works" section and making sure its properly cited. The current references are a little bare so I look forward to seeing what kind of sources you add.
I like the idea of including the "Changes to the Ministrel Show" but the title of that section seems out of place. Think about restructing that part and maybe including it as a subsection of another area.
Overall the article looks promising but definitely needs some updating with the sources, citations, and sentence structure. I'm excited to see what you do with it!