Wikipedia:Requests for feedback/2010 September 6

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Force_Fed_Lies_(Band)

Rivethead147 (talk) 04:19, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

The above article has been deleted. Shearonink (talk) 12:37, 7 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

FIEND (Metal Band)

Standonrubble (talk) 06:34, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Broken link above, but article has been deleted anyway. Shearonink (talk) 12:39, 7 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

User:HistoryPecanwood/History_of_Pecanwood_Estate

This is an article written by one of the Developers of this Estate. I can't seem to publish it as my article hasn't got enough reliable source or isn't notable enough. I need help please. I do not know can help me. I need this article published so other users can edit it asap.

Thanks

HistoryPecanwood (talk) 08:50, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

While there are a few reliable sources, the majority of the sources is still unreliable. Links to articles in Wikipedia are not reliable sources. Most of the article seems to be a narration. That is not encyclopedic. Also, you can't use members of the community as references. References must be either online or in print. They must be from reliable places. Wikipedia is not the place for a history pamphlet. Please read WP:What Wikipedia is not. Bejinhan talks 06:42, 8 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

User:Spencerbartz/John_V._Hager

This is a biography of John V. Hager. A candidate for California's 23rd congressional race. I attempted to create this article before, but it was taken down and referred to as a 'vanity candidate.' The candidate has obtained the number of signatures necessary to appear on the ballot, and is appearing on southern California news challenging incumbent Lois Capps to debates. I believe this to be noteworthy because if Capps were to be unseated by Hager, or the outcome of the race changed by Hager, Hager would have a national and international influence in congress or by having caused someone else to be in congress. I don't understand what is specifically wrong since I have found 5 other such wikipedia articles of candidates who were private civilians before declaring their candidacy (i.e. no political experience).

Spencerbartz (talk) 09:06, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

WP:POLITICIAN covers some of the reason this gentlemen does not meet inclusion requirements on Wikipedia. All of the sources provided are not considered reliable sources because they are directly involved with the subject and would not be from a neutral point of view- McMatter ^(talk)/_(contrib) 02:43, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Matt_Sky

Just need some structural help, plenty of reputable news links to back this article up but I'm still a little unfamiliar with the best way to setup the page. Thanks so much!

Robotman23 (talk) 10:41, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I see that (today) it has been tagged for speedy deletion as an article about a real person that does not credibly indicate the importance or significance of the subject.

I'm not sure if it will be deleted under that category, but it is certainly a problem that there are no reliable sources with articles actually about this person; they are mentioned in articles, but that in itself is not enough to show notability - see WP:VRS. Chzz ► 09:51, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

360Amigo_System_Speedup

Hello guys, Will you help me with this article? I found 360Amigo System Speedup and it did a good job cleaning my computer. It is worth adding it to the Wikipedia community.

Villesoft (talk) 13:22, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I don't think that currently meets the notability requirements - see WP:GNG. "lockergnome.com" doesn't look like a reliable source; to be 'notable' we would need several reviews in newspapers / magazines with a 'reputation for fact-checking and accuracy'.

The list of "Features" and "Editions Comparison" are not really encyclopaedic content; see WP:NOTGUIDE and other parts in WP:NOT. Chzz ► 10:11, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

User:Alexgrant2006/_intact_KOF_(Kofi_Owusu_-_Rapper)

Hi i am a fan of an upcoming artist named KOF from liverpool UK, his music is a fusion of rap and dance and i need help in letting the world know who he is, I have a bio i just need pics added and diocography info can you help with structure

thanks

Alexgrant2006 (talk) 13:29, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Do not worry about the formatting; the essential thing is to show notability; as an 'upcoming artist' that might not be possible. Articles need references to reliable sources such as newspapers, magazines, books; currently it has no such references. Please see WP:GNG and WP:BAND.

Also, it needs to maintain a neutral point of view; at the moment, it does not, e.g. renowened for agressive lyrics...unique and undeniable realism...soulful voice and melodic flow...a breath of fresh air etc. These are opinions, not verifiable facts. Chzz ► 10:13, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

User:Vkvt-webmaster/Victor_Kan

Need comments before going live. Not sure if the references will be considered "reliable" or if more are needed (this is my first ever Wikipedia entry). Also need comments on the neutrality of the content.

Vkvt-webmaster (talk) 14:17, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Firstly, it lacks context; what does this person do? See WP:LEDE.

Reference.com isn't a reliable source, no, because it just gathers facts from other sources, like Wikipedia itself.

blogspot.com isn't either, and in fact that looks like a copy of a Wikipedia article - and Wikipedia is not a reliable source.

Reference need to be something with a 'reputation for fact-checking and accuracy', with editorial control - such as published newspapers. User-generated websites are not appropriate. Blog-sites and wikis are not reliable sources. Chzz ► 10:20, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Saratoga Springs History Museum

I am not quite sure what qualifies as a reference in this article I created. I intended it to be a descriptive article about the Saratoga Springs History Museum. Please let me know if I need to make any other improvements to the article. Thanks!

Hughesrk (talk) 14:43, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

All articles - regardless of the subject - should contain verifiable information; you require independent reliable sources. Perhaps the museum has featured in some newspaper articles, magazines, or books...those (generally) make good references.

Apart from that, it looks pretty good; it just needs some appropriate independent references. Maybe have a look at some 'good articles' on similar topics for ideas;

DuSable Museum of African American History – Hallie Ford Museum of Art – Imperial War Museum – John F. Kennedy Library – Louvre Abu Dhabi – Madame Tussauds Hong Kong – Musée du Louvre – Museum of Contemporary Art, Chicago – Palanga Amber Museum

Chzz ► 10:26, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

User:Andylmusic76/Andrew_Lapp_(pianist)

Hello I recently submitted this article for Andrew Lapp. I have added credible sources and will continue adding more as time allows, but for some reason it will not let me submit my article. Is there something I am missing? What should I do?

Thank you,

LMC Records

Andylmusic76 (talk) 16:40, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Based on your username, I wonder if this is an autobiography - in which case, please read that link.

In addition, I think that you might need to change your username, because company names / group names / promotional names are not permitted. I don't know if this is the case; if it is just a nickname, then that's fine. See Wikipedia:Username policy.

The article has some lines with dotted boxes around them, that is because the lines begin with a space

like this one.

As regards making it live - you cannot move pages until you have made at least 10 edits, at which point your account becomes auto-confirmed and the 'move' option will appear. Best, Chzz ► 10:31, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Back_to_Scratch

Hi, I created a new page for Charlotte Church's forthcomming 6th studio album "back to scratch" and was just wondering if it's ok? thanks.

Duphin (talk) 19:16, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I suggest waiting until the album is released and gets some reviews; most albums are not notable until they have been released, and many such articles are deleted. YouTube is not an appropriate reliable source, and the website is a primary source. It'd need to show independent coverage; see WP:VRS and WP:NALBUM. Chzz ► 10:35, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

User:Ach.bhu/Bhupendra_Kumar

This page is about a personality who achieved huge milestones in very less age. I recommend this page to go online.

89.218.196.180 (talk) 19:16, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

You have not provided references to reliable sources, so it does not show why the person is notable; please see WP:BIO. Chzz ► 10:37, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

User:Cfdc49/Jesse_Armour_Crandall

I'm ready for some constructive feedback. In another wiki page Charles Henry Crandall it was suggested it might need to be wikified. I'm struggling to understand just what that is.

I need help in grouping together similar references/sources. That is, I refer to one magazine article and I've seen other sites where these are combined. I just don't know how to do it, I guess.

Thanks. Cfdc49 (talk) 20:10, 6 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Looks good. Maybe the introduction needs work – for instance, the reference to his family seems out of place.

You can re-use a footnote by naming it, see WP:REFNAME. I quickly went over your citations, hope it helps.

To wikify means to add wiki-links to other articles. Of course, they should be mostly terms with which the average reader would not be very familiar. Nkrita (talk) 11:40, 9 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

User:Tukenk

I would like to find out how I can fix the <ref> issue in my external links. I didn't place any such reference and just sites for additional information regarding the subject itself. Tukenk (talk · contribs) 20:17, 6 September 2010

I think that you must mean the page User:Tukenk/Enter your new article name here, which I've just moved to User:Tukenk/George Spirou Thanos.

Currently, the references are a bit odd, because it says (for example) <ref>Reference 1</ref>. Instead, you should put the actual reference in-between there. For example;

Chzz is 98 years old.<ref> "The book of Chzz", Aardvark Books, 2009. </ref>

He likes tea. <ref> [http://www.nicecupofteaandasitdown.com Tea website] </ref>

To see the result of that, please look at user:chzz/demo/simpleref. Edit it, and check the code

In addition, please make sure that all the facts have an appropriate reference, so that the reader can verify the acts; born in Bethesda,...training at the Kim Studio at the age of 13...Ki Whang Kim trained George...1966 received his black belt - all these facts need references, and all others. Chzz ► 10:44, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Pure-N-Heart

There is a sufficient amount of references and resources (from various sources) included in the article regarding this topic. I would appreciate it if someon could give feedback regarding this article so it could be published. It would be appreciated greatly.

Only1measure (talk · contribs) 20:49, 6 September 2010}}

Hi!

Try to convert some of the external links into references, if possible.
Find related articles and insert links to the article, where relevant.
Add some links to other articles.
Add an infobox and the logo of the organization.
Remove the duplicate "references" section.

ℳono 02:45, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

User:Pawelljr/Robert_A._Knox

Hello, looking for feedback on my first posting. Many thanks. Paul Pawelljr (talk · contribs) 20:56, 6 September 2010

Welcome!

The first line reads like a resume. Try to make it sound like an entry in an encyclopedia (Robert A. Knox is a person who does something).
Separate the article into sections; it is more organized that way.
The most important thing to do is to add reliable references. We need to make sure that all the content in articles are verifiable; biographies of living people without references will be deleted.
Add an infobox and a freely licensed picture, if possible.

ℳono 02:39, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]

All_My_Friends_Are_Dead_(book)

Feedback requested. Thanks!

Suitsandboots (talk · contribs) 21:36, 6 September 2010

Hello!

The article needs more references, from reliable sources. If these are not added, the article may be deleted.
You don't need to use the |thumb]] for the image; this creates an unwanted border.
Try and add more content, like reviews from publications, a description of the plot, etc.

ℳono 02:31, 13 September 2010 (UTC)[reply]